Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Land Of The Dead Dogs

Now this is creepy as all get-out.


NEWS.com.au-SCIENTISTS have created eerie zombie dogs, reanimating the canines after several hours of clinical death in attempts to develop suspended animation for humans.

US scientists have succeeded in reviving the dogs after three hours of clinical death, paving the way for trials on humans within years.

Pittsburgh's Safar Centre for Resuscitation Research has developed a technique in which subject's veins are drained of blookd and filled with an ice-cold solution.

The animals are considered scientifically dead, as they stopped breathing and have no heartbeat or brain activity.

But three hours later, their blood is replaced and the zombie dogs are brought back to life with an electric shock.

Plans to test the technique on humans should be realised within a year, according to the Safar Centre.
Paging Al Gore...

Monday, June 27, 2005

Good Night, John-Boy

No, not that John Walton.


Yahoo News-BENTONVILLE, Ark., June 27-It is with great sorrow that Wal-Mart Stores, Inc., announces the death of John Walton. A Vietnam War hero, member of the Wal-Mart Board of Directors and philanthrophist, Walton was killed when the ultra-light aircraft he was piloting crashed shortly after takeoff from the Jackson Hole Airport in Grand Teton National Park. The crash occured at approximately 1:20 p.m. CDT and the cause has not yet been determined. Walton, 58, was the aircraft's sole occupant.
Say what you want about Wal-Mart's deals with China, they are a true American success story, and any company that stands up to unions the way they have can't be all bad. R.I.P. Mister Walton.

Friday, June 24, 2005

Holy Origin Story, Batman

Well, I saw Batman Begins today, and I have to say that it is definitely the best since the first two. Very character oriented, and Michael Caine was a terrific choice for Alfred. I liked the fact that every character actually had something to do in this movie instead of just being window dressing for special effects or some big-name guest star. And the Batmobile rocked!

Thursday, June 23, 2005

King of What Castle?

Well, I guess it's now official-private property no longer exists in the US of A.


Fox News: WASHINGTON-A divided Supreme Court ruled Thursday that local governments may seize people's homes and businesses against their will for private development in a decision anxiously awaited in communities where economic growth often is at war with individual property rights.

The 5-4 ruling represented a defeat for some Connecticut residents whose homes are slated for destruction to make room for an office complex. They argued that cities have no right to take their land except for projects with a clear public use, such as roads or schools, or to revitalize blighted areas.

As a result, cities now have wide power to bulldoze residences for projects such as shopping malls and hotel complexes in order to generate tax revenue.
Remember during the 2004 campaign, when Hillary!(tm) said "We're going to take things away from you for the common good?" Well, the Supreme Court just beat her to it.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Klansman Klipped

Justice has finally been served.


Yahoo! News-Forty-one years to the day after three civil rights workers were beaten and shot to death, an 80-year-old former Ku Klux Klansman was found guilty of manslaughter Tuesday in a trial that marked Mississippi's latest attempt to atone for its bloodstained, racist past.

The jury of nine whites and three blacks took nearly six hours to clear Edgar Ray Killen of murder but convict him of the lesser charges in the 1964 killings that galvanized the struggle for equality and helped bring about passage of the 1964 Civil Rights Act.

Killen, a bald figure with owlish bifocals, sat impassively in his wheelchair, an oxygen tube up his nose, as he listened to the verdict.

When asked to comment, Roberty Byrd said only that he would burn a cross in the man's honor.

Say Goodbye, Dick

Senator Dick Durbin has changed his tune.


FOX NEWS: WASHINGTON-Sen. Dick Durbin went to the Senate floor late Tuesday to offer his apologies to anyone who may have been offended by his comparision of treatment of detainees at the U.S. military base at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, to Nazis, Soviet gulags and Cambodia's Pol Pot.

"More than most people, a senator lives by his words...occasionally words fail us, occasionally we will fail words," Durbin, D-Ill, said.
Now, if he would apologize on behalf of the Democratic Party for the antics of Howard Dean, Barbara Boxer, et al, that might also be a step in the right direction. But I'm not holding my breath.

Monday, June 20, 2005

Top Squirt Gun

Is Tom Cruise all washed up, or just being a big drip?


FOX NEWS: LONDON-The London premier of Steven Spielberg's "War of the Worlds" turned into a war of words after Tom Cruise was squirted in the face by a man posing as a reporter.

Four men were released on bail and ordered to return to a police station Monday, when they may be charged with assault, a police spokseman said.

The 42-year-old actor was outside a movie theater in central London's Leicester Square doing press interviews Sunday when a man squirted Cruise with a water pistol disguised as a microphone, London's Metropolitan Police said.

Cruise appeared to laugh at the incident but then asked the prankster: "Why would you do that?"

As the man gave a barely audible excuse, Cruise said, "Do you like thinking less of people, is that it?" The prankster tried to walk away but Cruise reached across the metal barrier, held his arm and said: "Don't run away. That's incredibly rude. I'm here giving you an interview and you do that...it's incredibly rude."

The actor grew increasingly irritated and told the man: "You're a jerk."

Hey, Tom, it could have been worse. The guy could have reminded you of Legend.

Leave Your Politics At The Door

Somebody double check the reality meter. Bob Geldof is actually making sense!


THE DRUDGE REPORT: Live 8 founder Bob Geldof is determined to see his international concerts stay focused on the plight of Africa's poor-and not fall into cliched Bush bashing and global warming rhetoric!

Geldof has ordered show organizers and producers to redouble all efforts to keep LIVE 8 performers "on message" during the July 2 event, the DRUDGE REPORT has learned.

"Please remember, absolutely no ranting and raving about Bush and Blair and the Iraq war, this is not why you have been invited to appear," Geldof said to the manager of a top recording artist, who asked not to be identified. "We want to bring Mr. Bush in, not run him away."

Excuse me while I go outside to check for flying pigs.

Friday, June 17, 2005

We're Not Gonna Take It Anymore

It's about time.


Fox News: Washington-Culminating years of frustration with the performance and behavior of the United Nations, the House voted Friday to slash U.S. contributions to the world body if it does not substantially change the way it operates.

The 221-184 vote, which came despite a Bush administration warning that such a move could actually sabotage reform efforts, was a strong signal from Congress that a policy of persuasion wasn't enough to straighten out the U.N.

"We have had enough waivers, enough resolutions, enough statements," said House International Relations Committee Chairman Henry Hyde, R-Ill., the author of the legislation. "It's time we had some teeth in reform."
Word to Kofi: The gravy train is over.

Bigots 'R' Us

Now this is rich, especially coming on the heels of Dick Durbin's comparisions of U.S. soldiers guarding detainees to Nazis.


Yahoo! News-A handful of people at Democratic National Headquarters distributed material critical of Israel during a public forum questioning the Bush administration's Iraq policy, drawing an angry response and charges of anti-Semitism from party chairman Howard Dean on Friday.

"We disavow the anti-Semetic literature, and the Democratic National Committee stands in absolute disagreement with and condemns the allegations," Dean said in a statement posted on the DNC website.

Rep. John Conyers of Michigan, the senior Democrat on the House Judiciary Committee, organized the forum on Thursday at the Capitol to publicize and discuss the so-called Downing Street memo. That document suggests that the Bush administration believed that war with Iraq was inevitable and that the administration was determined to use intelligence about weapons of mass destruction to justify the ouster of Iraqi President Saddam Hussein.
Well, it's nice to see that the party that produced Robert Byrd hasn't forgotten its racist roots, isn't it?

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Jacko Moonwalks

The verdict is in.


Yahoo! News-Wanly blowing kisses of gratitude to his screaming fans, Michael Jackson left court a free man Monday and went back to Neverland to pick up the pieces of his shattered career after he was cleared of all charges in his child-molestation trial.

Jackson, 46, heard the words "not guilty"uttered 14 times in a deathly still courtroom. The Peter Pan of pop music could have gotten nearly 20 years behind bars if convicted of charges that he molested a 13-year-old cancer survivor at Neverland in 2003.

A motionless Jackson dabbed at his eyes with a tissue as the verdicts were read, and he later was embraced by his chief lawyer, Thomas Mesereau Jr. Another member of the defense team burst into tears, and some of the women in the jury also wept and passed around a box of tissues.
Not surprisingly, the most tissues were reserved for members of the media outside the courtroom, who were weeping as they realised that they now have nothing to talk about.

Sunday, June 12, 2005

What A Detainee Wants

If I were this guy, I'd take the water. From Time Magazine, we get an inside look at interrogation methods used at Gitmo:


Dripping Water or Playing Christina Aguilera Music: After the new measures are approved, the mood in al-Qahtani's interrogation booth changes dramatically. The interrogation sessions lenghten. The quizzing now starts at midnight, and when Detainee 063 dozes off, interrogators rouse him by dripping water on his head or playing Christina Aguilera music. According to the log, his handlers at one point perform a puppet show "satirizing the detainee's involvement with Al Qaeda." He is taken to a new interrogation booth, which is decorated with pictures of 9/11 victims, American flags and red lights. He has to stand for the playing of the U.S. national anthem. His head and beard are shaved. He is returned to his original interrogation booth. A picture of a 9/11 victim is taped to his trousers. Al-Qahtani repeats that he will "not talk until he is interrogated in the proper way." At 7 a.m. on Dec. 4, after a 12-hour, all-night session, he is put to bed for a four-hour nap, TIME reports.
Heck, if they really wanted to torture this guy, there's a ton of other music out there that would have him singing like a canary. The Barney song would be considered against the Geneva Convention in most countries, for example.

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Brother, Where Art Thou?

Mikey seems to have gone missing.


FOX NEWS-Where is Michael Jackson and who is speaking for him now?

In the never-ending chaos at the Neverland Ranch, Michael Jackson's publicist was fired without notice or personal contact by his brother Randy.

At the same time, no one seems to know exactly where Michael Jackson is. His phone at Neverland is said to have a "do not disturb" block on it, and sources inside the ranch are said to fear being fired if they tell him what's really going on within his organization.

Randy Jackson, considered desperate to hold on to some kind of power in his brother's organization after being relieved of all financial responsibilities this week, issued a statement on his Web site around 6 p.m. last night.

The statement, written by Randy's girlfriend, Taunya Zilklie, read: "MJJ Productions regretfully announces the termination of Raymone Bain and Davis, Bain and Associates. We thank you for your services."
Speaking from his cardboard box, Tito Jackson said, "I don't know where he is-heck, I'm still trying to find my career!"

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

She Got The Job

Finally! After all the whining and threats, it came down to a simple vote after all.


WASHINGTON (AP)-the Senate on Wednesday confirmed California judge Janice Rogers Brown for the federal appeals court, ending a two-year battle filled with accusations of racism and sexism and shadowed by a dispute over Democratic blocking tactics.

Senators quickly followed by ending another long-term filibuster, clearing the way for a vote Thursday on former Alabama Attorney General William Pryor as outlined in an agreement last month that averted a showdown that could have brought the Senate to a halt.
The Democrats folded like a cheap tent today. Let's hope it's a trend.

Saturday, June 04, 2005

Impeach This!

The source is Al-Jazeera, so I don't know how much stock to put in this, but if it's true it could be the best thing yet to happen to the Republican Party.


John Kerry announced Thursday that he intends to present Congress with The Downing Street Memo, reported last month by the London Times. The memo purports to include minutes from a July 2002 meeting with Tony Blair, in which Blair allegedly said that President Bush's administration "fixed" intelligence on Iraq in order to justify the Iraq War.

-snip-Failed presidential candidate Kerry advised that he will begin the presentation of his case for President Bush's impeachment to Congress, on Monday.

Kerry said of the memo: "When I go back [to Washington] on Monday, I am going to raise the issue. I think it's a stunning, unbelievably simple and understandable statement of the truth and a profoundly important document that raises stunning issues here at home. And it's amazing to me the way it escaped major media discussion. It's not being missed on the Internet, I can tell you that."
No, John-Boy, what's stunning and amazing is that you think that this has a snowball's chance in hell of succeeding. Like a Democrat winning the White House for the next generation if you actually go through with this.

Jailbait Jacko?

Well, the Pale One's fate is now in the hands of twelve citizens.


SANTA MARIA, Calif. (AP)-The child molestation case against Michael Jackson went to the jury Friday after the defense begged the panel to acquit the singer, portraying Jackson as a victim of grifters trying to pull "the biggest con of their careers." Jurors spent about two hours deliberating before going home for the weekend.
That's funny-I thought the biggest con was Michael Jackson trying to convince people he was black.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Dutch Treat

In the wake of the surprising show of common sense by the French, the good people of Holland have added another nail in the European Union's constitution.


AMSTERDAM, Netherlands-Dutch voters overwhelmingly rejected the European Union constitution Wednesday, delivering what could be a knockout blow for the charter roundly defeated just days ago by France.

Less than an hour after the polls closed, Prime Minister Jan Peter Balkenende conceded defeat in his campaign to ratify the constitution and said the government would respect the results of the referendum.

"Naturally, I'm very disappointed," he said in a televised statement.
Jacques Chirac couldn't be reached for comment. He was too busy curling himself up in a fetal position, sucking his thumb, and muttering about how cold it was.