Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Die, Hippie Die

Why didn't this woman use Slayer and wipe them all out?
A gun-toting stalker, who claimed she was pressured into a lesbian affair by members of a hippie-style commune on Staten Island, opened fire on its co-founder in a midnight ambush that left him critically wounded, authorities said yesterday.

Despite his life-threatening injuries, Jeff Gross, who helped establish Ganas, the city's oldest '60s-style commune, was able to tell cops who allegedly shot him once in the chest and twice in the arm outside his Tompkinsville home Sunday night.

Yesterday, heavily armed, flak-jacketed detectives fanned 0ut across Staten Island searching for the crazed suspect: former commune member Rebekah Johnson, 43.
Want to know the really funny part? The guy was on his way home from seeing Al Gore's movie. It's Al's fault!

Sore Losermen

They just can't get over the fact that they keep losing Presidential elections.
SACRAMENTO-Six years after Democrat Al Gore won the popular vote but lost the presidency to Republican George W. Bush, there's a new move afoot in the California Legislature and other states to ensure that such things never happen again.

The linchpin is a proposed "interstate compact," designed to guarantee that presidents will be selected by popular vote, without amending the U.S. Constitution or eliminating the electoral college.

Assemblyman Tom Umberg, a Santa Ana Democrat who chairs the Assembly Election and Redistricting Committee, said the basic premise is understandable even to children.

"When you're in first grade, if the person who got the second-most votes became class leader, the kids whould recognize that this is not a fair system," he said.
If he really wants to educate kids about what to do if you lose an election, he should tell them about temper tantrums, vote challenges and lawsuits.

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Radio G.E.E.K.

The Nerds are taking over the airwaves!
Dr. Michio Kaku is one of the world's leading experts in theoretical physics, and according to New York magazine, one of the "100 Smartest People in New York."

He is now hitting the radio air waves with his new "Science Fantastic" show, syndicated by TRN entertainment.

Kaku discusses today's hottest and most relevant scientific/cultural topics, covering everything from time travel, reversing the aging process, the future of medicine and biotechnology, to hip, provacative discussions on the science behind love, philosophy and the future of the human race.
Finally-a radio show for the inner geek in all of us.

An Inconvenient Rant

For a guy who says he's not running in '08, Al sure is making a lot of noise.
Al Gore has made his sharpest attack yet on the George Bush presidency, describing the current US administration as "a renegade band of rightwing extremists."

In an interview with the Guardian today, the former vice-president calls himself a "recovering politician", but launches into the political fray more explicitly than he has previously done during his high-profile campaigning on the threat of global warming.

Denying that his politics have shifted to the left since he lost the court battle for the 2000 election, Mr. Gore says: "If you have a renegade band of rightwing extremists who get hold of power, the whole thing goes to the right."
Now this concerns me. Androids can be dangerous when their emotion chips kick in...

Hot Jihad In The Summertime

It's the start of a new season, which means things are back to normal in the country that turned surrender into an art form.
POLICE sent reinforcements to the troubled suburbs of northern Paris yesterday after a night of rioting revived fears of a return to the violence that raged through France's immigrant housing estates last year.

In another sign of continuing racial tension, the Government also ordered an inquirey into an anti-Semetic black group that staged an aggressive march through the Jewish quarter of the capital.

Seven policemen were injured on Monday night in the town of Montfermeil. Rubber bullets and stun grenades were fired at youths, many of whom were masked and wielding baseball bats. About 100 youths hurled projectiles and petrol bombs at police and public buildings and attempted to storm the home of Xavier Lemoine, the town's Mayor. The violence was sparked by the arrest of a suspect over the beating of a bus driver.
Normally I'd scoff at France's troubles, but lately it seems this is the road we'll be headed down in a few years.

Dead From The Neck Up

Heh. How right Archie Bunker was.
YOU CAN NEVER BE TOO rich or too thin, the saying goes, and it certainly holds true for California's june 6 primary. State Controller Steve Westly, a former eBay executive and Democratic candidate for governor, has spent $34.5 million of his own fortune in hopes of earning the right to face Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger this fall. The other Democrat candidate in the race, State Treasurer Phil Angelides, would certainly be out of the running by now but for a wealthy friend who spent $6 million on an "independent" expenditure to prop up his flagging campaign. As for the Governator, he's not exactly living on K rations. According to the Los Angeles Times, Team Arnold has spent nearly $145 million (including $25 million of Sxhwarzenegger's own money) on various campaigns over the past five years.

Meanwhile, only two initiatives will be on the ballot--an anorexic figure by California standards--and one of them now lacks its main champion. That would be Rob Reiner, the movie director and left-wing activist who is responsible for Prop. 82, which would guarentee preschool for every California 4-year-old by raising taxes on the state's top income-earners ($400,000 for individuals, $800,000 for couples). Reiner's sudeen exit from the debate and the possible defeat of Prop. 82 may augur the return of a California politics that is less starstruck and less sentimental. One can only hope so, at any rate.
I wouldn't count on it. Meathead will probably run for Governor himself someday. Hey, Warren Beatty did it...

The Super Adventure Party

Michael Jackson changes his citizenship.
Pedophiles in the Netherlands are registering a political party to press for lowering the legal age of sexual relations from 16 to 12 and allow child porn and bestiality.

On its website, the Charity, Freedom and Diversity Party declares: "We are going to shake The Hague awake!"

The party, which plans to register tomorrow, says it eventually wants to get rid of the age limit on sexual relations, Reuters reported.

Ad van den Berg, a party founder, told the Algemeen Dagblad newspaper a "ban just makes children curious."
No word on whether Chef plans to run as a candidate.

Rudy, Where Art Thou?

Hizzonor's RINO transformation is now complete.
New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg announced over the Memorial Day weekend that he supports gay marriage. And he vowed that city officials will begin marrying same sex couples as soon as he can get state courts to legalize the practice.

"I believe New Yorkers should have the right to marry whomever they choose, regardless of sexual orientation," Bloomberg said in a Saturday radio address. "If [the Court of Appeals] rules that same-sex marriages are legal, then we'll perform them."

He was referring to a lawsuit due to be heard by the court this week that focuses on five same-sex couples seeking marriage licenses in New York City.
Mr. Mayor, why don't you just switch parties and be done with it?

Monday, May 29, 2006

Morons Not On Parade

Speaking of getting things right, President Bush gives Phony Fred Phelps and his Phreaks a Memorial Day smackdown.
President Bush, marking Memorial Day with a speech paying tribute to fighting men and women lost in war, signed into law Monday a bill that keeps demonstrators from disrupting military funerals.

In advance of his speech and a wreath-laying at America's most hallowed burial ground for military heroes, Bush signed the "Respect for America's Fallen Heroes Act." This was largely in response to the activities of a Kansas church group that has staged protests at military funerals around the country, claiming the deaths symbolized God's anger at U.S. tolerance of homosexuals.

The new law bars protests within 300 feet of the entrance of a national cemetary and within 150 feet of a road into the cemetary. Those violating the act would face up yo a $100,000 fine and up to a year in prison.
I'd love to see Phony Phelps in prison. Considering that he's probably one of the aforementioned homosexuals, it might actually be a good time for him.

Bush III:The Last Stand?

He may not want the job yet, but that hasn't stopped big brother and others from showing their support.
Republican Party leaders continue to mull a Bush III administration-with Gov. Jeb Bush of Florida as a candidate in 2012 and 2016, says a report in the New York Times.

By then the current president's poor poll ratings will be less of a factor-much as George Bush's bad numbers at the end of his term in 1992 did not cripple his eldest son when he ran for president in 2000.

In an interview with a group of Florida newspaper reporters some weeks ago, President Bush said that he had "pushed" his brother "fairly hard about what he intends to do" and that his political future "is very bright, if he chooses to have a political future."
Now, Jeb may make a good President. But how many Bushes do we need for one of them to finally get it right?

Sunday, May 28, 2006

For Mom, Baseball, and Apple Pie

On this Memorial Day weekend, I thought it only appropriate that this should be remembered.
Some readers may have forgotten about this. Some may not have been alive at the time. However, thirty years ago this past April, as America was in the process of celebrating its bicentennial, Chicago Cubs centerfielder Rick Monday, a former Marine Corps Reservist, made one of the greatest plays in baseball history...but it didn't involve a ball, a bat, or a glove.

As protestors were trying to set fire to an American flag in the centerfield of Dodgers Stadium in Los Angeles, Monday darted by, grabbed Old Glory, and saved her fron a disturbing fate in front of a huge Chavez Ravine crowd.

According to Inside Baseball: "This moment and the symbol it represented-freedom, history and those who have lost their lives in battle to save Old Glory-had countless Americans talking, from politicians in Washington, D.C. and throughout the country to military veterans to everyday people. It was ranked as one of the top 100 classic moments in baseball history by the National Baseball Hall of Fame committee and third on Sporting News' list as the most 'unusual' moment to occur on a major league baseball field."
So here's to you, Rick Monday, wherever you are. You had a good game, indeed.

Bonehead In The U.S.A.

Springsteen is still Trapped in the Sixties.
MANSFIELD, Massachusetts (Reuters)-Branching off from his rock'n'roll roots, Bruce Springsteen kicked off his summer U.S. tour on Saturday with songs made famous by folk musician and activist Pete Seeger and strong political overtones.

Backed by a raucous 18-piece band, Springsteen played folk tunes including "We Shall Overcome," an anthem of the U.S. civil rights movement and "Bring Them Home," an anti-war song dating to the Vietnam War era.

During a break between songs, he offered harsh words for the administration of President George W. Bush and its handling of last year's devestating Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans, which killed more than 1,500 people in New Orleans alone.

"I've never seen anything like it in any American city," Springsteen said of the flooding and destruction. Referring to Bush, whom he called "PResident Bystander" in a performance in New Orleans last month, Springsteen added, "He managed to gut the only agency, through political cronyism, that could help people at a time like this."
Bruce, go back through the Tunnle of Love and settle down in Atlantic City. The Sixties are over, and so are you.

Romancing The U.N.

What's he going to do, go to every house and take people's guns away from them like in The American President?
Actor Michael Douglas-who for many years has been designated by the United Nations as a "U.N. Peace messenger"-is backing the global body's upcoming conference on small arms trafficking.

In a public service announcement, Douglas "spotlights the illicit trade in small arms and light weapons and promotes an upcoming U.N. conference aimed at addressing the problem," according to the U.N. Ness Center.

The controversial conference wins the prize for having the longest name in memory: "The U.N. Conference to Review Progress Made in the Implenetation of the Program of Action to Prevent, Combat and Eradicate the Illicit Trade in Small Arms and Light Weapons." It is scheduled for July 26 through July 7 in New York City.
Mr. Douglas, to paraphrase your character in the aforementioned movie, these are serious times, and your fifteen minutes are up.

Hasta La Vista, Free Speech

Mexican sepratists, er, activists, display their displeasure with those who disagree with their goal of retaking the Southwest in their usual manner.
Police at Pasadena City College in Southern California say they have no suspects in the theft of 5,000 copies of the campus newspaper despite a claim by students identifying themselves as members of Movimiento Estudiantil Chicano de Aztlan-MEChA-saying they were responsible.

The theft, which occured a week ago, was first noticed by distribution manager Kris Calnon while on his way to the Campus Courier's office. An empty newsstand that he had held 300 papers only two hours before caught his eye.

"I gave it three buncles," he said. "It usually takes a day and a half to empty."

According to Calnon, 10 minutes later, a student came to the office to say he had seen a man grab a stack of papers from the women's gym and carry it into the men's gym.
They're only doing the censorhip that American leftists won't do.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Lawmen Vs. Lawmakers

Maybe next time Bush will be smart and let his people do the jobs they're supposed to do.
WASHINGTON-The Justice Department signaled to the White House this week that the nation's top three law enforcement officials would resign or face firing rather than return documents seized from a Democratic congressman's office in a bribery investigation, administration sources said.

The possibility of resignations by Attorney General Alberto Gonzale, his deputy, Paul McNully, and FBI Director Robert Mueller was communicated to the White House by several Justice officials in tense negotiations over the fate of the materials taken from Rep. William Jefferson's office, according to the sources. They spoke on the condition of anonymity because of the issuse's sensitivity.

Justice prosecutors and FBI agents feared that the White House was ready to acquiesce to demands from lawmakers including House Speaker Dennis Hastert, R-Ill., that the materials be returned to the Louisiana congressman, who is the subject of an FBI investigation.
Tell Dennis Hastert to take a flying leap, and Bush to grow a spine.

Dirty Deeds

He may speak for the trees, but Al has a toxic skeleton in his closet.
Former Vice President Al Gore's new global warming movie, "An Inconvenient Truth," warns in emphatic terms that the world is facing a "planetary emergency" unless America curbs its penchant for fossile fuel pollution.

Despite widespread covereage of Gore's cinematic debut, however, the press had declined to mention a few inconvenient truths about the ex-veep's own environmental record.

One of the most glaring tidbits, for instance, is the pollution Gore and his family caused by maintaining their own toxic waste dump on their farm in Carthage, Tennessee.
So, Al, can we look forward to a sequel-maybe something like, "An Inconvenient Past?"

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Eyes On The Prize

Yasir Arafat, Jimmy Carter, Kofi Annan, and...Oprah?
Not every celebrity has a Nobel Peace Prize fan club. But admirers of Oprah Winfrey, television talk show host extraordinaire, thought she needed one.

"She truly deserves the Nobel Peace Prize," reads the Opra4PeacePrize Web site. "We intend to be celebrating an Oprah victory next December 2006 in Oslo, Norway."

The annual prize, awarded since 1901, recognizes individuals and organizations for their humanitarian work, peace movements, human rights efforts, mediation of international conflicts, arms control and disarmament.
It's only a matter of time before Oprah-ism joins Voodoo as a mainstream religion.

Lowest of the Low

How much longer are the British going to put up with this lunatic?
The Respect MP George Galloway has said it would be morally justified for a suicide bomber to murder Tony Blair.

In an interview with GQ magazine, the reporter asked him: "Would the assassination of, say, Tony Blair by a suicide bomber-if their were no other casualties-be justified as revenge for the war on Iraq?"

Mr. Galloway replied: "Yes, it would be morally justified. I am not calling for it-but if it happened it would be of a wholly different moral order to the events of 7/7. It would be entirely logical and explicable. And morally equivalent to ordering the deaths of thousands of innocent people in Iraq-as Blair did."
Calling this guy lower than pond scum is an insult to pond scum. This goofball is long overdue for a padded cell.

The Governator Vs. The Girlymen

Arnold gets it right.
Breaking a policy of not commenting on pending bills, a spokesman for Arnold Schwarzenegger says the California governor will veto at least one of three controversial education measures related to sexual orientation.

The governor opposes a measure passed by the Senate and pending in the Assembly that would remove "sex-specific" terms such as "mom" and "dad" from textbooks and would require students to learn about the contributions homosexuals have made to society, the Sacramento Bee reported.

SB 1437 passed the Senate May 11 with a 22-15 vote.

"The governor believes that school curriculum should include all important historical figures, regardless of orientation," said Schwarzenegger's director of communications, Adam Mendelsohn, according to the Bee. "However, he does not support the Legislature micromanaging curriculum."
Say what you will about Arnold, when he wants to he can still Terminate stupidity.

Kenny Goes Down

Kenny-Boy is going away.
Former Enron Corp. chiefs Kenneth Lay and Jeffrey Skilling were convicted Thursday of conspiracy to commit securities and wire fraud in one of the biggest scandals in U.S. history.

The verdict put the blame for the 2001 demise of the high-profile energy trader, one the nation's seventh-largest company, squarely on its top two executives. It came in the sixth day of deliberations following a trial that lasted nearly four months.

Lay was also convicted of bank fraud and making false statements to banks in a seperate non-jury trial before U.S. District Judge Sim Lake related to Lay's personal banking.

Lay was convicted on all six counts against him in the trial with Skilling. Skilling was convicted on 19 of the 28 counts against him, including one count of insider trading, and acquitted on the remaining nine.
So long, boys. Have fun sharing the soap together, you SOBs.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

That's A Man, Baby

Ah, Canada. A socialist Utopia (according to Michael Moore) where everybody gets equal protection under the law.
TORONTO (CP)-A group that supports transgender rights is applauding a "precedent-setting" decision by the Human Rights Tribunal of Ontario that gives transsexuals who are strip-searched by police the right to choose between male or female officers or both to perform the act.

The ruling, which stems from a complaint by a man who was in the process of becoming a woman, is a "win-win" for both transsexuals and police, said Laurie Arron of Egale Canada, a group that advicates equality for homosexual, bisexual and transgender people.

The transsexual complainant, Rosalyn Forrester, was strip-searched by male Peel Region police officers in May and August of 1999 and 2001.

Forrester said she asked to have the search performed by female police officers each time, but was repeatedly denied.

In its decision, the tribunal found the strip-searches constituted unintentional discrimination on the basis of sex.
I just wonder-if you drop the soap in Canada, can you request to have a female prisoner standing behind you?

Spot On

And the treehuggers wept.
FRESNO-The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service on Tuesday rejected a petition to list the California spotted owl under the Endangered Species Act, saying the population is stable and programs that prevent forest wildfires will allow it to thrive.

The decision rankled the environmental groups that had requested protection of the speckled, football-sized owl. This was their second effort to list the bird in three years.

The petition's denial was based in part on the recommendation of scientists commissioned to study the owl, said Steve Thompson, manager of the agency's California-Nevada operations office.
Nature can take care of itself better than the environmentalists think. There's a reason that lumber is a renewable natural resource, and it's not to make hippies happy.

Hillary Ho-Hum

Want to know why Al Gore suddenly looks exciting to liberal Democrats?
A speech today on energy policy by Sen. Hillary Clinton was "achingly dull," appearing to put some in the audience into "unconsciousness," according to a published account of the address.

The New York Democrat was speaking to the National Press Club in Washington, D.C., during a breakfast meeting slated to begin at 9 a.m.

"It began well enough," writes Francis Harris of Britain's Telegraph. "Resplendent in a lemon yellow two-piece and expensivelly bejewelled, her star power was plain the moment she entered the room. Everywhere, necks craned for a sight of the immaculately coiffered New York senator. But then she lost it. The half-hour speech was achingly dull, a meandering lecrure on energy policy which left the audience stifling yawns."
Hmm. Maybe it was Al in disguise. Come to think of it, have we ever seen the two of them together?

The Jig Is Up

Well, well, well!
The Speaker of the House of Representatives, Dennis Hastert, is under investigation by the FBI, which is seeking to determine his rold in an ongoing public corruption probe into members of Congress, ABC News has learned from high level government sources.

Federal officials say the information implicating Hastert was developed from convicted lobbyists who are now cooperating with the government.

Part of the investigation involves a letter Hastert wrote three years ago, urging the Secretary of the Interior to block a casino on an Indian reservation that would have competed with other tribes.

The other tribes were represented by convicted lobbyist Jack Abramoff who reportedly has provided details of his dealings with Hastert as part of his plea agreement with the government.
Methinks Hastert doth protest too soon. This is going to get interesting.

Crooks Of A Feather

So, what's the one issue that can bring both parties together? Immigration? Terrorism? No, it's protecting one of their own.
House Speaker Dennis Hastert demanded Wednesday that the FBI surrender documents it seized and remove agents involved in the weekend raid of Rep. William Jefferson's office, undeer what lawmakers of both parties said were unconstitutional circumstances.

"We think those materials ought to be returned," Hastert said, adding that the FBI agents involved "ought to be frozen out of that (case) just for the sake of the constitutional aspects of it."

The Saturday night search of Jefferson's office on Capitol Hill brought Democrats and Republicans together in rare election-year accord, with both parties protesting agency conduct they said violated the Constitution's seperation of powers doctrine.

"Not anyone here is above the law," Pelosi told reporters Tuesday, as she prepared to meet with the House speaker. But, she added, "I think you've seen abuse of power of the executive branch over this weekend."
You heard right. One of the most left-wing politicians in the country and the spokesman for the GOP are agreeing with each other that accountability doesn't extend to them. And these peabrains wonder why the public has such a low regard for them.

Usama Been Bookin'?

Has Binny found new digs?
Pakistani government sources tell ABC News they have "credible reports" that Osama bin Laden and his entourage have moved down from high mountainous peaks along the Afghan border to a valley area 40 miles inside the Pakistan border.

The officials say the reports put bin Laden around Kohistan's Kumrat Valley.

Officials said the reports were validated by the release of bin Laden's audio tape yesterday, which appears to have been recorded only two weeks earlier.
If true, I hope they go in and just shoot the SOB. No muss, no fuss, no circus like there is with Saddam.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

"He's A Crook, But He's Our Crook"

Now what is his problem?
House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R-Ill.) told President Bush yesterday that he is concerned the Federal Bureau of Investigation's (FBI) raid on Rep. William Jefferson's (D-La.) congressional office over the weekend was a direct violation of the Constitution.

Hastert raised concerens that the FBI's unannounced seizure of congressional documents during a raid of Jefferson's Rayburn office Saturday night violated the seperation of powers between the two branches of government as they are defined by the Constitution.

"The Speaker spoke candidly with the president about the Federal Bureau of Investigation's raid over the weekend," Hastert spokesman Ron Bonjean said yesterday in confirming his boss's remarks.
Sorry, Dennis, I must have missed the part where lawmakers were above the law.

Don't Ask, He'll Yell

For a guy who likes to complain so much, Senor Fox sure is keeping his lip buttoned while he's here.
No questions. No questions. No questions. No questions. No questions. No questions. That's the official policy for Mexican President Vicente Fox's 24-hour visit to Utah that begins today.

Accrding to the latest version of the Mexican leader's schedule, released Monday by Gov. Jon Hunstman Jr.'s office, Fox won;t be saying anything here beyond his scripted speeches to various groups, including the Utah Legislature.

The schedule spells out that there are to be "no questions: at each of the six events Fox will attend and includes a note stating that a previously announced news conference "has been canceled due to scheduling changes."
Don't worry. Once he gets back home, he'll go back to complaining about fences and troops as usual.

"Don't Worry Kid, I'll Back You Up"

How would you like to have him as an alibi witness?
CAIRO, Egypt (AP)-Osama bin Laden purportedly said in an audio tape Tuesday that Zacarias Maussaoui-the only person convicted in the U.S. for the Sept. 11 attacks-had nothing to do with the operation.

"He had no connection at all with Sept. 11," the speaker, claiming to be bin Laden, said in the tape posted on the Internet.

"I am the one in charge of the 19 brothers and I never assigned brother Zacarias to be with them in that mission," he said, referring to the 19 hijackers.
Well, I guess that clears that up...

In Search Of The Creator

It will now collide with a piece of God and send Bender home.
Voyager 2 could pass beyond the outermost layer of our solar system, called the "termination shock," sometime within the next year, NASA scientists announced at a media teleconference today.

The milestone, which comes about a year after Voyager 1's crossing, comes earlier than expected and suggests to scientists that the edge of the shock is about one billion miles closer to the Sun in the southern region of the solar system than in the north.
Godspeed, Voyager. Don't forget to write!

"Bring Out Your Dead!"

Paging Randall Flagg, you're wanted on the white courtesy phone.
May 23 (Bloomberg)-All seven people infected with bird flu in a cluster of Indonesian cases can be linked to other patients, according to disease trackers investigating possible human-to-human transmission of the H5N1 virus.

A team of international experts has been unable to find animals that might have infected the people, the World Health Organization said in a statement today. In one case, a 10-year-old boy who caught the flu from his aunt may have passed it to his father, the first time officials have seen evidence of a three-person chain of infection, an agency spokeswoman said. Six of the seven people have died.
I don't know about anyone else, but I for one will welcome the arrival of our new albino mutant overlords.

Running Man

If the shoe fits, download it.
LOS ANGELES/NEW YORK (reuters)-Nike Inc. said on Tuesday that it is making running shoes that will be able to send data about the wearer's performance to an Apple Computer Inc.'s iPod using a new wireless system called Nike+iPod.

Shares of Nike rose over 2 percent as it capitalized on the popularity of the iPod line, which dominates portable digital music players. But one analyst said a relatively narrow section of Nike consumers would be interested in the running products.

Using a Nike+iPod Sports Kit, expected to retail for about $29, consumers will be able to access time, distance, pace and calories burned through the earphones of a nano version of the iPod via a sensor in the insole of special shoes that comminicate with the digital music player.
The next time somebody complains to you about how tough things are, tell them to download a mile in your shoes.

Justice Lunatics Unlimited

Super Adventure Club Twin powers, activate!
Scientology is about to unveil a previously secret spiritual training program called Spuer Power that promises to heighten participants' powers of perception.

The bizzare program is being prepared for a rollout in a new building under construction in Clearwater, Florida.

Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard taught that people have 57 "perceptics" that include not only the five senses, but also an ability to discern relative sizes, blood circulation, balance, compass direction, temperature, gravity and an "awareness of importantce, unimportance," the St. Petersburg Times reports.
No word yet on whether having sex with as many children around the world as possible is involved.

Google's Gag Order

Apparently Google has decided that free speech is not for everyone.
Search engine giant Google has cut off its news relationship with a number of online news publications that include frank discussions of radical Islam-the New Media Journal becoming the latest termination, as its owner just discovered.

Frank Salvato, who began the agreement with Google News last September, said he recieved a reply from the company's help desk Friday indicating there had been complaints of "hate speech" on his site, as first reported by media watchdog

The e-mail, which cited three articles that dealt with radical Islam and its relationship to terrorism, read:

Hi, Frank,

Thanks for writing. We received numerous reports about hate content on your site, and after reviewing these reports, decided to remove tour site from Google News. We do not allow articles and sources expressly promoting hate speech viewpoings in Google News (although referencing hate speech for commentary and analysis is acceptable).

For example, a number of the complaints we looked at on your site were found to be hate content:

We hope this helps you understand our position.

The Google Team

Newsbusters says it has observed a pattern of intolerance toward conservative sites that deal with radical Islam and terrorism.
Google-all the news they see fit to print.

Monday, May 22, 2006

Yo, Pimp My Dictatormobile

I don't understand why the Army just won't let the guy keep this. It's not like the previous owner will be needing it anymore.
NEW HAVEN, Connecticut-First Sgt. William von Zehle of the U.S. Army Reserves had his Mercedes-Benz 560SEL confiscated by U.S. Customs after he brought it home from Baghdad. Turns out the armored 1988 model may have belonged to Saddam Hussein, which means it could be considered a "war trophy."

The Associated Press reports that Von Zehle bought the 1988 Mercedes from a Baghdad civilian after seeing it in his driveway. He researched the car and found it matched three photos of a car in which Saddam Hussein was riding, so he acknowledges he was aware of its possible previous owner. The car is armored and has microphones and loudspeakers fitted inside. But that isn't the most unusual feature: the side-mounted flame-shooting pipes definitely are.
Heck, in L.A. that would be considered a theft deterrant.

Borderline Hypocracy

The next time Vicente Fox (or any other illegal apologist) opens his mouth to complain about troops or fences, Bush should remind him how things are done in Fox's neck of the woods.

MEXICO CITY-If Arnold Schwarzenegger had migrated to Mexico instead of the United States, he couldn't be a governor. If Argentina native Sergio Villanueva, firefighter hero of 9-11, had moved to Tecate instead of New York, he wouldn't have been allowed on the force.

Even as Mexico presses the United States to grant unrestricted citizenship to millions of undocumented Mexican migrants, its officials at times calling U.S. policies "xenophobic," Mexico places daunting limitations on anyone born outside its territory.

In the United States, only two posts-the presdiency and vice presidency-are reserved for the native-born.

In Mexico, non-natives are banned from those and thousands of other jobs, even if they are legal, naturalized citizens.

Foreign-born Mexicans can't hold seats in either house of the congress. They're also banned from state legislatures, the Supreme Court and all governorships. Many states ban foreign-born Mexicans from spots on town councils. And Mexico's Constitution reserves almost all federal posts, and any position in the military and merchant marine, for "native-born Mexicans."

This country's greatest strength has always been that we are a true melting pot. But that doesn't mean that the pot has to include the bad apples who break our laws. Before Mexico criticizes us, they should look at which country is really racist.

Bribes, Lies And Viedotape

Smile! You've been busted.
WASHINGTON-A congressman under investigation for bribery was caught on videotape accepting $100,000 in $100 bills from an FBI informant whose conversations with the lawmaker also were recorded, according to a court document released Sunday. Agents later found the cash hidden in his freezer.

At one audiotaped meeting, Rep. William Jefferson, D-La., chuckles about writing in code to keep secret what the government contends was his corrupt role in getting his children a cut of a communications company's deal for work in Africa.

As Jefferson and the informant passed notes about what percentage the lawmaker's family might recieve, the congressman "began laughing and said, 'All these damn notes we're writing to each other as if we're talking, as if the FBI is watching,'" according to the affadavit.
If the cash was found in his freezer, doesn't that make it a "Cold" case?

Private Poseur

This idiot will make a great Democratic Presidential candidate someday.
For those of you who have yet to see it, the internet is buzzing over this interview with former Army Ranger Jessie (in some accounts, "Jesse") MacBeth, who-like a modern day Winter Soldier-spins the familiar anti-war tale of an idealistic young man who goes into service proudly and eagerly, only to become disillusioned by the way his own comrades-in-arms are directed to behave by a brutish US military command, who encourages them to commit atrocities against innocent Iraqis.

A purported member of Iraqi Veterans Against the War, MacBeth tells us, "We're not there to help them"-a "truth" that has already been embraced by many on the anti-war left, and one that "MacBeth" reinforces in his interview. Poor, disillusioned soldiers-turned into anumals by an unfeeling and vicious command structure that has its own unspoken "agenda" for Iraq.

It's like an Oliver Stone movie, only (blessedly) about 3 hours shorter.

But as several people (including many confirmed soldiers) have already begun pointing out, there is much that is wrong with Army Ranger MacBeth's costume and story (incidentally, wasn;t it another MacBeth, who, on the "cherry-picked" prophecy of a cabal of evil (neocon?) witches, took power over a kingdom that was not rightfully his, and was later plagued by guilt, suspicion, and paranoia-and haunted by the ghosts of his misdeeds-until his wife went mad, and he, having plotted one too many machinations to secure his own imperialist power, is ultimately toppled and killed as a result of his own arrogance? Because oh! The irony!)-from the "laughable" "ranger" photo (which gets the wrong sleeve roll, the t-shirt, the beret flash, and shows no unit insignia) to the timing: notes Allah, who points to a story from an Arizona student newspaper (dated April 12, 2004) for context, "the narrator described MacBeth as having been in Iraq for 16 months. How, if he was already back in the U.S. thirteen months after the war began?"

And on and on...
Check out the video, available here. If he's a Ranger I'm Hillary Clinton.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

The Big Uneasy

Well whaddya think about this?


The Democratic National Committee (DNC) secretly placed political operatives in the city of New Orleans to work against the reelection efforts of incumbant Democratic Mayor Ray Nagin, the DRUDGE REPORT has learned.

DNC Chairman Howard Dean made the decision himself to back mayoral candidate and sitting Lieutenant Governor Mitch Landrieu (D-LA), sources reveal.

Dean came to the decision to back the white challenger, over the African-American incumbant Nagin, depsite concerns amongst senior black officials in the Party that the DNC should stay neutral.
On the other hand, I understand that Robert Byrd said, "Go for it!"

Good Night, John-Boy

Kerry's other half is hopping mad.
May 21, 2006--Former Sen. John Edwards, D-N.C., says George W. Bush is the "worst presdient of our lifetime," and "absolutely" worse than Watergate-tainted President Richard M. Nixon.

In an exclusive appearance on "This Week with George Stephanopoulos," the former presidential and vice presidential contender said of Bush, "He's done a variety of things--things which are going to take us forever to recover from.

"You have to give Bush and Cheney and gang credit for being good at politics--you know, good at political campaigns," Edwards added. "They're very good at dividing the country and taking advantage of it. What they're not good at is governing, and it shows every single day in this administration. And the country is going to pay a huge price for that."
It's time for John-John and his tampon to be flushed once and for all.

Brother, Can You Spare A Motto?

I'm sure this will make the Druid and Wiccan kids happy.
A Keller school district said political correctness has run amok at her daughter's elementary school, where the principal chose to mit the words "In God We Trust" from an oversize coin depicted on the yearbook cover.

Janet Travis, principal of Liberty Elementary School in Colleyville, wanted to avoid offending students of different religions, a district spokesman said. Students were given stickers with the words that could be affixed to the book if they so chose.

Debi Ackerman of North Richland Hills said she is offended by the ommission. It's yet another example of a politically correct culture that is removing Christian references from all public places, she said.

"I think it's mostly ridiculous," said Ackerman, whose daughter Tawni, 10, took the book home Thursday afternoon. "Now it has come to this....When is it going to end?"
Don't worry, Ms. Ackerman. The ACLU will let us know when our kids are completely safe from the evils of non-secular thought.

Cos And Effect

Bill Cosby lays the smackdown. Makes girlyman cry.
...The mostly black crowd at the university last week was on Cosby's side. Through two two-hour sessions, Cosby coaxed poignant stories of violence, abuse, self-reliance and redemption from his panel members, who included educators, family court experts and a mother of adopted children who was named the city's "Foster Parent of the Year."

As I pondered how sad it is that the problems of our communities receive so much more media attention than the solutions, conflict erupted. The heckler, whom news reports called "a self-decribed community activist," started shouting from the audience. He derided Cosby's "watered-down dialogue" and demanded answers to Michael Eric Dyson's highly publicized book, "Is Bill Cosby Right? (Or Has The Black Middle Class Lost Its Mind?)."

That's when Cosby lost his cool. The 68-year-old former college athlete jumped off the stage, wireless microphone in hand, and raced up the aisle to loom over his somewhat astonished questioner. "I'm sick of you and your Dyson," Cosby declared. "Dyson is not a truthful man."

In a backstage interview with me and another journalist, Cosby scoffed at the "elitist" charge coming from Dyson, a black professor at the ritzy University of Pennsylvania. "And how much does it cost to go there [to Penn]?" taunted Cosby, who attended Philadelphia's less-elite-but-still-proud Temple University on a track-and-field scholarship. "How many black students do they have at Penn?" he continued. If Dyson taught at a school like the University of the Disctrict of Columbia that serves mostly lower-income non-whites, Cosby said, "then maybe he could talk."
Rule number one of Cos Club: Do Not Talk About Cos behind his back. Rule Number Two: Do Not Be Surprised if Cos comes and wipes the floor with you.

Burning The Hand That Feeds You

"No coverage? Jihad!!"
Three cars belonging to the al-Jazeera news network were torched in Ramallah on Saturday night.

Eyewitnesses said masked gunmen were seen fleeing the area.

The cars were parked in the underground parking lot of the City Center Building in downtown Ramallah, where al-Jazeera has a large bureau on the eighth floor.

(snip) ...Sources in the city told The Jerusalem Post that Fatah supporters were behind the torching of the al-Jazeera cars.

The sources said the Fatah supporters were angry with al-Jazeera because it had not covered an anti-Hamas demonstration in the city by Fatah earlier in the day.
Don't laugh. Leftists in this country are pretty close to doing the same thing to get attention.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Robot Run

The Talking Tree is thinking about taking another shot at it.
For the first time since he retired from politics four years ago, former Vice President Al Gore is hinting that he may be ready to get back into the ring with a presidential run.

Following a presentation of his new global warming movie, "An Inconvenient Truth," in Atlanta earlier this week, Gore was pressed on whether he'd consider running for president.

"I'm a recovering politician," he told Atlanta's Progressive News. "But you always have to worry about a relapse."
The question is, would the android vote go for him a second time around?

Dead Man Delaying

Now isn't this ironic.
SOUTHFIELD, Mich.-An attorney for Jack Kevorkian said the assisted-suicide advocate will probably not survive another year if kept in prison, as he again asked the state to grant his client a pardon or commute his sentence,

Laywer Mayer Morganroth said he applied to the state Parole Board and Gov. Jennifer Granholm on Friday seeking a pardon, parole or commutation, citing the 77-year-old's deteriorating health.

"Kevorkian has become increasingly frail and has fallen twice, injuring his wrist and fracturing two ribs," Morganroth said in a statement.

His blood pressure has gone "through the roof," the lawyer said Saturday.
C'mon, Doc. Quit your whining. Give yourself a dose of your own medicine, and get it over with.

ACL Who?

Students support free speech. Liberal heads explode. Film at 11.
RUSSEL SPRINGS-A federal judge barred prayer during a Russell County High School graduation ceremony last night but it included a religious message nonetheless: Megan Chapman made sure of that.

Chapman, chosen by fellow seniors to deliver opening remarks, had planned to include a prayer as had been the practice at commencement for decades. Instead, she talked of her faith and God's love.

"God will never leave you or frosake you," she said drawing a loud standing ovation from the 2,000-plus people packed into the gym.

Many in the conservative county did not agree with U.S. District Judge Joseph McKinley's decision barring the prayer.
Well, the Judge has jut gotta lock these kids up and throw away the key. After all, if we allow more freedom of speech in this country, kids won't be able to get their daily dose of propaganda from the schools! /sarcasm mode off

Who's Your Dadullah

Monty Python couldn't do much better than these morons.
SPIN BOLDAK, Afghanistan (Reuters)-A man claiming to be Taliban commander Mullah Dadullah said by telephone a report he had been captured in Afghanistan was untrue and he vowed to fight on against Afghan and foreign troops.

The man telephoned a Reuters reporter late on Friday, hours after the BBC reported the capture of Dadullah, one of the Taliban's top commanders, after heavy clashes in the southern province of Kanahar.

"I am Mullah Dadullah. The reports about my arrest are not only false but a pack of blatant lies," said the man, who sounded like Dadullah.
I know Baghdad Bob needs a job these days, but he could do better than these Taliban twits.

Asphalt And Old Lace

"Good evening. Tonight we bring you a tale of greed and geriactrics."
LOS ANGELES-police are investigating two women in their 70s who they believe hatched a scheme to offer two homeless men shelter, then collect more than $2 million in insurance policies after they were killed in hit-and-run-clashes.

Police also believe the women may have committed the accidents and were befriending other men to set up more insurance polices.

"Anyone would think that even though they're making financial gains for this, that they would leave the actual dirty work to someone else or hire someone," police Detective Dennis Kilcoyne said. "We're not so sure about that anymore."
Obviously this is a result of the violent Alfred Hitchcock culture.

Friday, May 19, 2006

Oil And Wusses Don't Mix

What's good enough for China apparently still isn't good enough for us.
WASHINGTON (AP)-Despite talk of an energy crisis and the need for independence from foreign oil, Congress seems to be in no mood to open more of the country's coastal waters to energy development.

The House late Thursday rejected an attempt to end the quarter-century ban on oil and natural gas drilling that has been in effect for 85 percent of the country's coastal waters from Alaska to New England despite arguments that new supplies are needed to lower costs.

Lawmakers from Florida and California, who led the fight to continue the drilling moratorium, said they feared energy projects as close as three miles from shore could jeopardize multibillion-dollar tourism industries in their states.
Not to mention spoil the views of wealthy Malibu liberals as they drive to work in their Cadillac Escalades and Lincoln Navigators, right, guys?

Bi-Lingual Buffoon

Dinghy Harry wants everyone to know what a moron he is in two languages.
Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid called a proposal to make English the official language "racist" on the Senate floor yesterday.

"This amendment is racist. I think it's directed basically to people who speak Spanish," the Democrat said during the already tense debate over immigration reform.

Moments later, the Senate approved the measure on a 63-34 vote. Virtually all Republicans were joined by 11 Democrats to approve the largely symbolic amendment. Immediately following that vote, the Senate approved a second amendment, declaring on a 58-39 vote that English is the "common and unifying language."
Is there an amendment that can ban asinine comments from senators who represent a minority of a minority?

Illegal Entitlements

This is the most boneheaded thing I've yet seen, and it's another reason why the RINOS who run the GOP need to be thrown out on their ears.
The Senate voted yesterday to allow illegal aliens to collect Social Security benefits based on past illegal employment-even if the job was obtained through forgd or stolen documents.

"There was a felony they were committing, and now they can't be prosecuted. This sounds like amnesty to me," said Sen. John Ensign, the Nevada Republican who offered the amendment yesterday to strip out those provisions of the immigration reform bill. "It just boggles the mind how people could be against this amendment."

The Ensign amendment was defeated on 50-49 vote.

"We all know that millions of undocumented immigrants pay Social Security and Medicare taxes for years and sometimes decades while they work to contribute to our economy," said Sen. John McCain, Arizona Republican.

"The Ensign amendment would undermine the work of these people by preventing lawfully present workers from claiming Social Security benefits that they earned before they were authorized to work in our community," he said. "If this amendment were enacted, the nest egg that these immigrants have worked hard for would be taken from them and their families."
Err, Senator, these people are here illegally. They don't deserve a "Nest egg."

Peta, The Other White Meat

If you cut their heads off, would these idiots still run around?
A human inside an injured-chicken costume, hobbling in protest on the sidewalk Wednesday in front of a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant, didn't achieve the desired effect, according to many who dined there.

Brad Steig called Wednesday's protest in Grand Junction by the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals good advertising for KFC.

The protest consisted of four adults and one child holding signs in front of the restaurant, handing out fliers and DVDs and urging people to jot eat at KFC until the restaurant buys chickens from humane vendors.

Steig, a manager for Halliburton, said he heard about the PETA protest on the radio and decided right then to eat at KFC on Wednesday, the day of the protest.

Not only that, but he bought seven of the biggest buckets of chicken and all the side dishes and used four trips to load them into his Halliburton pickup to treat his co-workers.

"I detest that organization," Steig said, adding PETA tries to harm the economy because of personal agendas.
By all means, save the chickens. We need something to go with the mashed potatoes and baked beans.

Heil Mullah

For a government whose president says the Holocaust never happened, they sure seem bent on repeating it.
In a move reminiscent of the Nazis forcing Jews to wear a Star of David insignia, Iran's parliament has reportedly passed a law requiring Jews, Christians and other religious minorities to identify them as non-Muslims.

The law would also set a dress code for all Iranians, requiring them to wear "standard Islamic garments."

The law, which must be approved by Iran's "Supreme Leader" Ali Khamenei before taking effect, requires Iran's roughly 25,000 Jews to sew a yellow strip of cloth on the front of their clothes. Christians would be forced to wear red badges and Zoroastrians would wear blue cloth, according to Canada's National Post.
Those who don't remember history are doomed to repeat it. Which means that Ahmadinejad will be quite surprised when he finds himself pointing a gun in his mouth when we come calling.

The Senile Socialist

Now this would make him one crazy old Commie.
Cuban President Fidel Castro, who turns 80 this year, enjoys vibrant health and will live to 140, his chief doctor said.

Doctor Eugenio Selman-Housein, who heads Castro's medical team, denied that the longtime leader has Parkinson's disease, as the CIA reportedly believes.

"Every day they invent a new one," Selman-Housein said. "He will live 140 years."
That would make him longer-lived than the Soviet Union and Red China combined. It also means he won't remember the Soviet Union and Red China.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Hillary And Her Fair Weather Friends

The Queen will not be pleased.
NEW YORK-Actress Susan Sarandon, a longtime liberal political activist and outspoken opponent of the Iraq war, endorsed an anti-war Democrat challenging Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton's re-election bid Tuesday.

Sarandon is backing Jonathan Tasini, a labor advocate and former president of the National Writers' Union, who has based his longshot campaign on Clinton's vote in 2002 authorizing military intervention in Iraq.

Clinton, who is widely considered the front-runner for the 2008 Democratic presidential nomination if she chooses to run, has sharply criticized the Bush Administration's handling of the war. But she has also refused to call for American troops to be removed from Iraq.
Seriously, how much further to the left do you have to go to want to run against Her Hillariness?

Liar's Club

Don't you just love the irony?
The securities class-action law firm of Milberg Weiess Bershad &Schulman was charged today with several criminal counts, including obstructing justice, perjury, bribery and fraud.

The 20-count indictment, handed up by a federal grand jury in Los Angeles, represents the most prominent confrontation between the government and a law firm in years. While federal investigators won multimillion-dollar settlement from big corporate law firms over their role in the savings and loan scandals, no major law firm has faced a criminal indictment in recent memory.

Milberg Weiss has been the dominant law firm in winning multimillion-dollar lawsuits against huge corporations on behalf of shareholders who claimed they were wronged. Its success was so great that Congress raised the legal hurdle for winning such lawsuits in the 1990's.

Today, the firm was accused of secretly paying kickbacks, beginning in 1981 and continuing through 2005, to plaintiffs in class-action lawsuits. While the indictment does not prevent the firm from practicing law, it is expected to have a huge impact on the business.
Being an ambulance chaser just isn't what it used to be, right, guys?

Don't Let The Door Hit You On The Way Out

Arlan Specter may be a RINO, but this is as good a smackdown as I've ever heard of.
A Senate committee approved a constitutional amendment bannning same-sex marriage Thursday, after a shouting match that ended when one Democrat strode out and the Republican chairman bid him "good riddance."

"I don't need to be lectured by you. You are no more a protector of the Constitution than am I," Judiciary Committee Chairman Arlen Specter, R-Pa., shouted after Sen. Russ Feingold declared his opposition to the amendment, his affinity for the Constitution and his intention to leave the meeting.

"If you want to leave, good riddance," Specter finished.

"I've enjoyed your lecture, too, Mr. Chairman," replied Feingold, D-Wis., who is considering a run for president in 2008. "See ya."
Awww, Russel doesn't want to play anymore. Wait until he notices the "Kick Me" sign taped on his back.

Dr. Demento's Dinosaur Days

This lunatic says it's all Satan's fault that guys like him aren't taken seriously. I think it might be another reason.
One of the nation's most popular and controversial proponents of creation science is coming to Morgan County.

Dr. Kent Hovind, a former high school science teacher and the founder of Creation Science Evangelism ministries, will address creationism's religious and scientific origins. Hovind's seminar is sponsored by the Morgan County Baptist Association, and Shiloh Baptist Church Youth Pastor Paul Miller said evolution;s origins are based on Satan, not science.

"The very beginning of the Bible says in the beginning God created," said Paul Miller, youth pastor at Shiloh Baptist Church. "Throughout history, the devil has had a well-thought-out strategy to attack the word of God. Through what I call modern and postmodern times, the devil has orchestrated this thing such that people think we evolved."

Hovind posits that evolution has been consistently disproven by science, a claim he's willing to put money on. He has pledged $250,000 to anyone who can provide empirical evidence of evolution. Hovind said only three people have taken him up on his offer, and none walked away with the money.
I'm sorry, Doc, but the three guys from the trailer park who keep talking about the time they got probed by aliens don't count.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

This Is An Ex-Thug

Why don't they just ask Elvis?
The FBI on Wednesday searched property northwest of Detroit for clues to the disappearance of Jimmy Hoffa, officials said. TV newscasts showed people with shovels and freshly turned dirt at the site.

The Teamsters leader was last seen in July 1975 at a restaurant in Oakland County's Bloomfield Township.

Agent Dawn Clenney, a spokeswoman for the FBI in Detroit, said the bureau was executing a search warrant in Milford Township, about 35 miles from Detroit.

Investigators are looking for "evidence of criminal activity that may have occured under previous ownership" on the property, Clenney said.
Uri Geller knows the King. Maybe he could give him a call.

The Arab's Burden

Yeah, right. Like they ever cared before.
Saudi Arabia has unsuccessfully argued to the Bush administration that shutting off aid to the Palestinian government and isolating its new Hamas leaders will racicalize a destitute population and set back the cause of peace with Israel.

"We are arguing the point, needless to say, with them strenuosly," Prince Saud al-Faisal, Saudi Arabia's longtime foreign minister, told reporters Wednedsay. "It is only through inclusion that you may change the position of Hamas."
I'll tell you what-once we do figure out a way to use biofuels or other sources of energy, it will be a great day just so that we can finally tell these parasites what they can go do with themselves.

The Desperate Dakotan

Oh, this will be fun.
Former Senate Democratic leader Tom Daschle whill gauge potential support for a 2008 presidential bid with stops in Iowa, New Hampshire and Michigan next month.

Daschle, the three-term South Dakota senator who lost a re-election bid in 2004, said Wednesday that the trip is a logical progression as he weighs a White House run.

"It's just taking the next step to a more thoughtful consideration of a presidential campaign," Daschle said in an interview with The Associated Press.
I'm sorry, Tom, but logical and thoughtful aren't exactly words that describe the Democratic Party.

Hey, Hey, Hey

In an age of Jesse Jacksons and Al Sharptons, there's at least one real leader in the black community who isn't afraid to tell it like it is.
Comedian Bill Cosby told a forum on family and education Tuesday night that African Americans should be proactive and fix their own communities.

"I have a problem with people sitting there and saying God and Jesus will find a way," Cosby said.

He also said he had a problem "with churches who allow drug dealers to set up two blocks away." The audience cheered several times during Cosby's remarks.
Cosby is out of touch. Doesn't he realize that you're supposed to blame everything on somebody else if you're a minority? What would happen to Al and Jesse if everybody started listening to him?

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

The Tinfoil Response

Well, this didn't take long.
May 16, 2006-The minute the Pentagon released images of the Sept. 11 attack on its building, the message boards at lit up with conspiracy theories.

Some blame it on an inside job by members of the Bush administration to benefit their business interests. Some say it was planned by neoconservatives to advance their worldview. Others don't know what happened but doubt the official story put forward by the government.

The world of conspiracy theories surrounding the Sept. 11 attacks is vast, and more than four years after the worst terrorist attacks on U.S. soil, countless scenarios are put forth on the Internet, in academic forums and on talk radio each day. Some are of the "MIHOP" variety, which claim people in power made it happen on purpose, while others are of the "LIHOP" kind-they let it happen on purpose.

With Tuesday's release of video footage of American Airlines Flight 77 crashing into the Pentago building, an attack that killed 184 people on Setp. 11, questions rage again.

"It doesn't clarify anything-I don't see a plane in that image," said Michael Berger, spokesman for "In fact, I thought it was underwhelming."
Unfortunately, the stupidity of these people is often overwhelming.

Se' Habla You In Court

Who do they think they're kidding?
Mexico said Tuesday that it would file lawsuits in U.S. courts if National Guard troops on the border become directly involved in detaining migrants.

Mexican border officials also said they worried that sending troops to heavily trafficked regions would push illegal migrants into more perilous areas of the U.S.-Mexican border to avoid detection.

President Bush announced Monday that he would send 6,000 National Guard troops to the 2,000-mile border, but they would provide intelligence and surveillance to support Border Patrol agents, not catch and detain illegal migrants.
I say if they want to sue in our courts, they should have to pay the legal fees in their money. The Mexican government would go bankrupt in days.

Churchill's Downs

Everybody's favorite fake Indian is in trouble.
An investigation of a professor who likened some of the Sept. 11 victims to a Nazi found serious cases of misconduct in his academic research, including plagiarism and fabrications, a university of Colorado spokesman said Tuesday.

One member of the five-person investigative committee recommended that ethnic studies professor Ward Churchill be fired, and four recommended he be suspended, university spokesman Barrie Hartman said.

Churchill, who has repeatedly denied any wrongdoing, declined comment Tuesday.
It couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

Girls On Film

Apparently women will no longer exist in Saudi Arabia.
RIYADH, Saudi Arabia (AP)-King Abdullah has told Saudi editors to stop publishing pictures of women as they could make young men go astray, newspapers reported Tuesday.

The king's directive, made in a meeting with local editors, caused surprise as the monarch has been regarded as a quiet reformer since he took office in the ultra-conservative country last August.

In recent months, newspapers have published pictures of women-always wearing the traditional Muslim headscarf-to illustrate stories with increasing regularity. Usually the stories have had to do with women's issues. The papers have also stated publishing a range of views on causes that are not generally accepted in Saudi Arabia-such as women having the right to drive and vote.

The king told editors on Monday that publishing a woman's picture for the world to see was inappropriate.
Saudi Arabia isn't a country. It's the world's biggest Boys Only treehouse!

Culture Of Glass Houses

There's a reason why the Demwits should think twice before opening their mouths.
May 16 (Bloomberg)-House Democrats' efforts to capitalize on what they call a Republican-created "culture of corruption" in Washington are being complicated by ethical allegations against two of their own members.

Representative Alan Mollohan of West Virginia, until April the ranking Democrat on the House Ethics Committee, said yesterday he's reviewing his financial disclosures after being accused of misstating personal assetts. Fellow Democrat William Jefferson of Louisiana vowed to stay in office and fight allegations that he accepted bribes.

Democrats have focused on Republican scandals as they try to regain control of Congress amid sagging approval ratings for President George W. Bush and congressional Republicans.
Don't worry, Dems. If you lose in November there'll still be plenty of hypocracy on your side to go around.

Monday, May 15, 2006


I just saw the President's big speech. First things first. I know he sincerely believes he's doing the right thing; trying to find the "Middle ground" he spoke of. He's right when he says it's impractical to simply deport 11 million people. I also agree with having a way for those who have been living here and not broken any laws to become citizens. But then he lost me with the "Jobs that Americans won't do" line, and the use of the National Guard sounds like a wholly symbolic gesture more than anything else.

It's about what I've come to expect with this Administration when it comes to domestic issues. Hope for the best, get the least.

They Have Met The Enemy And The Enemy Is Them

This sums up the GOP's problems in a nutshell.
Recent polls show shpport for Republicans is still declining, and President Bush's approval ratings are the lowest for any president other than Richard Nixon and Jimmy Carter in the past fifty years. The New York Times summed it up well recently:

Americans have a bleaker view of the country's direction than at any time in more than two decades, according to the latest New York Times/CBS News poll. Sharp disapproval of President Bush's handling of gasoline prices has combined with intensified unhappiness about Iraq to create a grim political environment fot the White House and Congressional Republicans.
I know; it's the Slimes. But there's more to Bush's troubles than the usual left-wing take on things.
This decline is fundamentally not a matter of PR or press bias but of policy and the philosophy behind it. Bush and the Republican Congress have had as difficult time selling themselves to the public because their policies have not been appealing. They have adhered to a philosophy, big-government conservatism, that has finally nearly alienated everyone. The War on Terror delayed the effects of this alienation for several years, but ultimately the Bush administration's errors and Congress's addiction to big spending-which was based on this big-government conservative philosophy-alienated both those outside the party, first, and then a great proportion of Republicans themselves.
Bush doesn't have to run for another term. But those in his party do. The problem is, so many of them have shown little reason why we should let them.

Stupid Southern Man

Here we have a guy who wants to take the Democratic Party back to its bigoted roots.
A Democrat candidate in Alabama who denies the Holocaust occured and seeks to "reawaken white racial awareness" is causing problems for state party leaders.

Larry Darby, running for attorney general, believes fewer than 140,000 Jews died in Europe during World War II and contends most of them were afflicted with typhus, the Associated Press reported.

The candidate, head of the Aethist Law Center, says the commonly held number of 6 million Jews killed by the Nazis is a false claim of the "Holocaust industry."
Sweet Home Alabama, where the stupid think this is true...

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Star Driver

At least it wasn't Jim Ignatowski.
He is the BBC's latest star-the cab driver who a leading presenter believed was a world expert on the internet music busniess.

The man stepped unwittingly into the national spotlight when he was interviewed by mistake on the corporation's News 24 channel.

With the seconds ticking down to a studio discussion about a court case invilving Apple Computer and The Beatle's record label, a floor manager had to run to reception and grabbed the man, thinking he was Guy Kewney, editor of, a specialist internet publication.

Actually, he was a minicab driver who had been waiting to drive Mr Kewney home.
"So, Reverand Jim, what do you think about the Internet decision?"

Rev. Jim: "What...does...the...Internet...mean?!?"

Castro Jr. Comes Calling

Attention, Europe! Latin America's favorite Mini-Me has a deal for you!
Venezuela's president Hugo Chavez arrives in London today with an extraordinary promise to offer cut-rate heating oil for needy families in Europe, modelled on a similar campaign in the US which has been seen partly as a bid to embarrass President George Bush.

Last night Chavez also issued a taunting obituary for the 'American empire' on the eve of a visit where he will be shunned by Downing Street but welcomed by London Mayor Ken Livingstone.

Chavez said in Vienna yesterday that the 'final hours of the North American empire have arrived...Now we have to say to the empire: "'We're not afraid of're a paper tiger.'"
Well, we're not afraid of you either, you little Communist twit.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Thugs For Tots

Union goons want you to pay up or shut up.
Union supporters of a California ballot measure promising "Preschool for All" have threatened several national retailers with a nationwide boycott if their companies or major shareholders make contributions to the opposition campaign.

Representatives for the Gap, Old Navy and Banana Republic-major mall-based clothing retailers-were sent letters last week from the Service Employees International Union and the American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees warning that a national action against all their stores would be taken if the Gap, its affiliates or any member of the Gap's founding family made a contribution to the No on Proposition 82 campaign, reports the Sacramento Bee.

Don Fisher, who founded the Gap, and his family also own Old Navy and Banana Republic.
Union thuggery. It's for the children!

The Singed Senator

"Ted, this is God. Can you hear me now?"
BOSTON-A plane carrying U.S. Sen. Edward M. Kennedy from a commencement speech in western Massachusetts to his Cape Cod home on Saturday was struck by lightning and had to be diverted to New Haven, Conn., a Kennedy spokeswoman said.

The plane lost all electrical power and the pilot had to fly the plane manually, according to Melissa Wagoner, Kennedy's press secretary. Nobody was hurt.

The Massachusetts Democrat had just delivered the commencement address at the Massachusetts College of Liberal Arts in North Adams and was on his way to Hyannis to spend Mother's Day with family when the plane was struck at about 2:45 p.m., she said.
In the event of a water landing, the passengers could have used Ted as a floatation device.

Mad Max

Somebody should tell him he's too old for this sh*t.
Film star and director Mel Gibson has launched a scathing attack on US President George W. Bush, comparing his leadership to the barbaric rulers of the Mayan civilisation in his new film Apocalypto.

The epic, due for release later this year, captures the decline of the Maya kingdom and the slaughter of thousands of inhabitants as human sacrifices in a bid to save the nation from collapsing.

Gibson reveals he used present day American politics as an inspiration, claiming the government callously plays on the nation's insecurities to maintain power.

He tells British film magazine Hotdog, "The fear-mongering we depict in the film reminds me of President Bush and his guys."
Mel, life is not a Conspiracy Theory. Bush apparently has more of a Braveheart than you do.

The Liberal Solution

Somehow, this doesn't surprise me one bit.
A letter to Bill Clinton written by the co-counsel who successfully argued the Roe v. Wade decision urged the then-president-elect to "eliminate the barely educated, unhealthy and poor segment of our country" by liberalizing abortion laws.

Ron Weddington, who with his wife Sarah Weddington represented "Jane Roe," sent the four-page letter to President Clinton's transition team before Clinton took office in January 2003.

The missive turned up in an exhibit put together by the watchdog legal group Judicial Watch, which has been researching the Clinton administration's policy on the abortion drug RU-486, notes James Taranto in the Wall Street Journal's Best of the Web.
But..but this would mean that Democrats are no better than Nazis! And Nazis were lying, manipulative racists who used fear to get into power and...oh.

Friday, May 12, 2006

Cross Burnings Are Extra Credit

Something tells me this guy shouldn't brag too much about who's IQ is bigger.
(Cayce)-Inside the walls of Brookland-Cayce High School, you expect students to be treated equally. But a viewer tip led News19 online where a teacher's comments left us asking questions.

"These sorts of things are going to upset people, but the truth can be very upsetting," said Brookland-Cayce High School teacher Winston McCuen.

That truth, at least according to McCuen, is that black people are inferior to whites.

"Intellectually, yes they are," said McCuen. "This has been confirmed over and over, and this is a generalization. Again, there are some blacks who are more intelligent than individual whites. But as a rule, that is true. I-Q tests prove it over, and over and over."
Well, he's proved one thing-stupidity comes in all colors.

School's Gone To Pieces

Give this judge an F.
An Alameda County judge granted the wish of 47,000 high school seniors on Friday by abolishing the exit exam as a graduation requirement this year.

Echoing his tentative decision issued Monday, Superior Court Judge Robert Freedman said substandard schools and a lack of quality teachers robbed the students of a chance to pass the test.

Denying them diplomas would cause significant harm, he wrote.

"Prospective harm to a student who is otherwise fully qualified to graduate is sufficiently clear," the ruling says. "Remaining for a fifth or subsequent year in an already stressed district or attending community college when the student might otherwise be accepted to a four-year institution all demonstrate significant risk of harm."
On the plus side, there will be no significant risk to those seeking future burger flippers.

Calling In The Calvalry

What we need is a modern-day Captain Brittles (as played by John Wayne). But this is a start.
(AP)-President Bush, trying to build momentum for a major overhaul of the nation's immigration laws, is considering plans to shore up the Mexican border with National Guard troops paid for by the federal government, according to senior administration officials.

One fefense official said military leaders believe the number of troops required could range from 3,500 to perhaps 10,000, depending on the final plan. Another administration official cautioned that the 10,000 figure was too high.

The offocials insisted on anonymity since no decision has been announced.

The president was expected to reveal his plans in an address Monday at 8 p.m. EDT. It will be the first time he has used the Oval Office for a domestic policy speech-a gesture intended to underscore the importance he places on the divisive immigration issue.
If they're worried about troops, we've got several thousand in Germany and South Korea, places where they're apparently not wanted. Bring them home and give them a border worth defending.

Gunning For Mr. G

It's starting early.
As a 2008 presidential bid by Rudy Giuliani looks increasinglyy likely, liberal media groups are lining up to take pot shots at the popular Republican.

The first major attack comes from a new documentary that seeks to debunk former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani as "America's Mayor"-and has opened in Manhattan. Even its director admits the film is anything but fair and balanced.

"I'm not claiming there's anything approaching objectivity in this film," director Kevin Keating says about "Giuliani Time," which is playing in one Big Apple theaer.

Publicity materials for the film say it is "certain to bust open the mythof Giuliani" as America's Mayor that developed after 9/11 and reveal his inner "totalitarian" impulses.

But a review in the City Journal calls it a "silly documentary" that "tries-and fails-to tar the record of America's Mayor."
Giuliani would absolutely destroy Hillary if she got the nomination. They must be desperate if they're going after someone as socially liberal as Giuliani.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

The Bear Is Back

I guess all that soul-peering didn't pay off after all.
The arms race is not over, said Russian President Vladimir Putin in announching his country's intention to strengthen Russia's military might.

Putin said in a nationally televised address to the Russian Parliament that Russia intends to begin building new generations of nuclear weapons, anti-missile weapons as he bolsters his nation's conventional military forces.

In a combative response to criticism of his increasingly repressive domestic and foreign policies, Putin pledged to boost his country's military power in an effort to counter pressure from abroad, explaining that over the next five years, Russia will "substantially increase the provision of strategic nuclear forces with modern long-range planes, submarines and launchers. Along with the means of overcoming the systems of anti-missile defense, which we already have, new types of weapons enable us to preserve what is undoubtadly one of the most important guarantees of lasting peace-namely, the strategic balance of forces.

"It is premature to speak of the end of the arms race. It is in reality rising to a new technological level," he said.
So much for glasnost. Well, it was fun while it lasted, Comrade.

Howard's End

Howard Dean is just making enemies left and left these days.
WASHINGTON-Democratic Chairman Howard Dean mischaracterized his party's platform on gay rights in an interview courting evangelicals, then set the record straight Thursday when an advocacy group called him on it.

Dean told Christian Broadcasting Network News that the 2004 Democratic platform declares "marriage is between a man and a woman"-just one of the points he made in reaching out to religious conservatives who are largely hostile to the party.

But the platform does not define marriage that way, and his remarks prompted the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force to return a $5,000 donation from the Democratic National Committee.
At this rate, between him and Hillary Clinton, the Democrats may not have any constituents left. Thank you, Howard!

Fightin' Words

Tony Snow is kicking butt and naming names.
WASHINGTON-New White House Press Secretary Tony Snow is starting off in a combative mode against the press by issuing detailed rebuttals to what he considers unfair coverage of Bush.

"The New York Times continues to ignore America's economic progress," blared the headline of an e-mail sent to reporters Wednesday by the White House press office.

Minutes earlier, another e-mail blasted CBS News, which has had an unusually rocky relationship with the White House since 2004, when CBS aired what turned out to be forged documents in a failed effort to question the president's military service.

"CBS News misleadingly reports that only 8 million seniors have signed up for Medicare prescription drug covereage," Wednesday's missive said. "But 37 million seniors have coverage." On Tuesday, the White House railed against "USA Today's misleading Medicare story."

"USA Today claims 'poor, often minority' Medicare beneficiaries are not enrolling in Medicare drug coverage," the press office complained. "But by April, more than 70 percent of eligible Hispanics, and more than 75 percent of eligible Asian-Americans are enrolled or have retiree drug coverage."
There's a new sheriff in town, boys and girls. And he's got your number.

The Best Campaign That Money Can Buy

Having realized that most people can't stand him, Al has decided to go back to the tried-and-true: buying your way into power.
Al Gore has such a fortune in Google stock that he could easily fund his own campaign for the White House, Democratic insiders say.

Gore became a senior advisor to the Internet search engine back in February 2001, and is a close froend of CEO Dr. Eric Schmidt. Google shares went public in 2004, and the stock has soared from $85 a share to more than $400. Co-founders Sergey Brin and Larry Page are worth an estimated $11 billion each.

Gore "owns a ton of Google and he's made enough money that he could wait until a month before and just drop $50 million in to launch a [2008] race," a well-placed Democrat told Deborah Orin of the New York Post.

"He's got way more than enough money to buy this thing at any point in the process."
There, now aren't you all glad he invented the Internet?

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

He Ain't President, He's My Brother

Will the third time be the charm?
ORLANDO, Florida-President Bush suggested Wednesday that he would like to see his family's White House legacy continue, perhaps with his younger brother Jeb as the chief executive.

The president said Florida Gov. Jeb Bush is well-suited for another office and would make "a great president."

"I would like to see Jeb run at some point in time, but I have no idea if that's his intention or not," Bush said in an interview with Florida reporters, according to an account on the St. Petersburg Times Web site.
And I would like to win the Lottery, Mr. President. But, if Jeb really is the "Smart one," it probably won't happen.

Paper Trail

Now this is dumb.
Bush Administration officials insist they have no idea how a minute-by-minute schedule for the President's trip to Florida landed in a pile of trash, where almost anyone could grab it, hours before the President took off.

But the White House does admit the document should have been burned not tossed.

The document in question appears to be a White House staff schedule for the President's trip to Florida Tuesday. And a sanitation worker was alarmed to find it in the trash long hours before Mr. Bush left for his trip.

It's the kind of thing you woule expect would be shredded or burned, not thrown in the garbage.
Randy Hopkins could not believe what he was seeing.

There on the floor next to a big trash truck was a thick sheaf of papers with nearly every detail of the President's voyage.
On the other hand, I'm sure that whoever was dumb enough to lose this probably still has his or her car keys.

We Fundraise, You Decide

What is going on here?
News Corp. Chairman Rupert Murdoch, owner of Fox News and the New York Post, said today that he is standing by his decision to host a political fundraiser for Sen. Hillary Clinton later this year.

During a conference call about his company's robust earnings report, I asked Murdoch what conservatives are to make of his willingness to support the liberal New York senator.

"It will be pretty modest support," Murdoch said. "It's giving the opportunity to people in our office to join us at a breakfast."

"We think that she's been effective on state issues and local issues here in New York. She's been an effective and good senator. And if people want to come to breakfast for $1,000, they're welcome. It's no big deal. It's not a million-dollar raising. It's got nothing to do with anything other than her Senate re-election."
You go have your breakfast, Mr. Murdoch. The rest of us will just lose our lunch.

Boob Tube Buffoons

Personally, I would rather watch porno videos starring Helen Thomas than this.
A Christian author and TV host whose latest book, "Intelligent Design Versus Evolution: Letters to an Aethist," debunks Darwinism has challenged fellow television personality Bill Maher to a public debate on the origins of the Earth.

Says Ray Comfort: "Mr. Maher, like all believers in the theory of evolution, simply has a blind faith in a theory-tale that can't be substantiated. It's just another opiate of the masses-a religion called 'Darwinism' that piously robes itself in what it thinks is 'science.' It is true science fiction.

Comfort hosts "The Way of the Master" with actor Kirk Cameron.
Their combined IQs together couldn't fill a thimble. Talk about a battle of wits between two unarmed individuals.

"Thank You For Saving Me-P.S. I Still Hate You"

The real question here is, why did they bother?
In a dramatic role reversal, Israel may have just saved the life of a key Palestinian leader who was marked for death by extemists in Hamas, the terrorist group that was swept into power in January's upset election.

Citing Israeli intelligence sources, the London Times reports that Hamas's military wing, the Izza Din Al-Qassem, was plotting to kill President Mahmoud Abbas at his office in Gaza.

"We monitor every movement of Hamas in Gaza," one Israeli source told the Times. "So when we learned that Abbas's life was in danger, we made sure to inform him without delay."
Irony-it's obviously a Zionist plot.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Insanity Defense For The Defense

So this is what happens when you get a lawyer who's even crazier than his client.
WASHINGTON (Reuters)-Former U.S. Attorney General Ramsey Clark, a member of Saddam Hussein's defense team, on Tuesday said the former Iraqi president's trial was a sham designed to justify the U.S.-led invasion.

Saddam's trial on charges of crimes against humanity was "a direct threat to international law, the United Nations, universal human rights and world peace," Clark said at a news conference. He demanded that proceedings be transferred from the Iraqi Special Tribunal to a new court that could work independently, free of prejudice.

Clark, who was attorney general under President Lyndon Johnson from 1967-1969, said the United States wanted the trial to "vindicate its invasion, to validate its occupation, and to make the world believe that the Iraqi people demanded that Saddam Hussein and leaders in his government be executed."
Clark has got to stop sharing the bong with his client. He's going to wind up sharring a rubber room with Michael Moore and Cindy Sheehan.

We 'Ave Returned, Mon Ami

Well, this should make everyone feel better.
SOUTHWEST ASIA, May 9, 2006-The French Navy Carrier Air Wing returned to the coalition fight last week, flying their first missions in support of Operation Enduring Freedom since November.

"Our main mission while we are here is to support troops on the ground and contribute to reconnaissance efforts as well," said lt. Col. Gerard Brunel, commander of the French detachment at the Combined Air Operations Center. It is Central Command Air Forces policy not to disclose the specific location of its forward headquarters or the CAOC.

The French also hope to strengthen cooperation with countries in the Indian Ocian and the Asia-Pacific region and reinforce their operational capacity, he added.
"Now when you surrender, our Asian mon amis, remember to use ze white flag, not ze yellow one. Ze white is for ze surrender, and ze yellow is for ze running away, non?"

Runnin' With The Devil

Well now, isn't that special.
JERUSALEM-Christians who support Israel are distorting their true faith, have adapted Satan as god and compromise the greatest danger to world peace, according to a senior Palestinian Authority cleric.

The cleric, whose article on Christianity and Israel is posted on an official PA government website, also accuses Zionist Christians of persecuting Palestinians and directing the war in Iraq, and he calls for pro-Israeli Christian denominations to be expelled from the "world church."

"Very few people know the truth about this [Christian Zionist] movement, which unconditionally supports the Zionist enemy and unconditionally opposes Islam and the Muslims, writes Hamed Al-Tamimi, director of inter-religious dialogue for the PA's Judicial Council.
It must have been the pitchforks and human sacrifices that gave us away...

Hero Of The Night

Sometimes you can be in the wrong place at the right time: According to the Tennessean, Shaw arrived to the Waffle House around 3:20 a.m., j...