Everybody panic! President Bush will have a colonoscopy Saturday and temporarily hand presidential powers over to Vice President Dick Cheney, the White House said.
Press secretary Tony Snow told reporters Friday that Bush will have the procedure looking for signs of cancer at his Camp David Md., mountaintop retreat.
He last had such a colorectal cancer check on June 29, 2002. It will be a normal procedure, except that they will have to remove Mr. Bush's head from his ass first.
I keed, I keed!