Monday, April 30, 2007

The Meditation Man

Everybody say "Ooooohm!"
Filmmaker David Lynch will announce during a global webcast (www.DavidLynchFoundation.org) on Tuesday, May 1, at 12 noon (EDT), the David Lynch Foundation's new plan to end school violence: Teach one million students around the world to meditate to transform schools from breeding grounds of stress and violence into centers of creativity and peace.

The David Lynch Foundation has already provided nearly $5 million to support in-school Transcendental Meditation programs for thousands of students in public and private schools in the United States and around the world to learn how to meditate. (See www.StressFreeSchools.org.)
I'd also add getting rid of the gangbanger mentality that's being perpetuated by idiotic white suburban wannabes, but that's just me.

We All Live In A Warming Submarine

Meanwhile, back on Earth, it turns out the ocean may be more evil than we thought.
THE United States' leading hurricane forecaster says global ocean currents, not human-produced carbon dioxide, are responsible for global warming.

Willian Gray, a Colorado State University researcher, also said the Earth may begin to cool on its own in five to 10 years.

Speaking to a group of Republican MPs, Dr Gray had harsh words for researchers and politicians who said man-made greenhouse gases were reposnible for global warming.

"They are blaming it all on humans, which is crazy," he said.

"We're not the cause of it."
Maybe it's the farting whales-the SUV's of the sea...

Get Your Ass Off Mars

I'n telling you, it's those darn Martians and their SUV's.
Mars is being hit by rapid climate change and it is happening so fast that the red planet could lose its southern ice cap, writes Jonathan Leake.

Scientists from Nasa say that Mars has warmed by about 0.5C since the 1970s. This is similar to the warming experienced on Earth over approximately the same period.

Since there is no known life on Mars it suggests rapid changes in planetary climates could be natural phenomena.
That does it. I demand that the Sun stop using so much toilet paper and start buying carbon credits.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

London Calling, Mon Ami

Apparently things in France are so bad even the French are leaving.
THIS Wednesday Marine Fretel, an intelligent, well-educated young French woman, will board a train to London. She has left her Paris flat, packed a large suitcase and said goodbye to family and friends.

She does not expect to return. Fretel is one of the "Eurostar generation" of French professionals fleeing to London and other cities abroad in the hope of better careers in a land of opportunity.

The farewell parties held each week in Paris are multiplying, and although the government puts a brave face on the exodus, this rush for the exit is an embarrassing symptom of chronic French woes as the country prepares to pick its new president.

A dearth of jobs in France, the world's fifth largest economy, has turned London, less than three hours from Paris by Eurostart, into an eldorado for young professionals such as Fretel. Friends in London have told her that the British capital, unlike the one she is leaving behind, is a "city of dreams."
I guess the lure of a 35-hour work week and the right to riot if you're asked to work longer hours just doesn't have the appeal it used to.

A Few Good Moderates

Not all Muslims are buying into Islamism.
Police said more than 1 million people rallied in Istanbul on Sunday in defence of Turkey's secular system and against the military's threat of intervention amid a politial crisis over presidential elections.

"Turkey is secular and will stay that way," chanted the protestors, who carried Turkish flags and portraits of the founder of modern Turkey, Mustafa Kenal Ataturk.

"We want neither Sharia, nor a coup, but a fully democratic Turkey," they said.
We have people like this in America. They're called moderates. Our religious right calls them evil, too.

Saturday, April 28, 2007

The Waiting Is The Hardest Part

See, this is the kind of BS that's turned the GOP into a shadow of its former self.
TALLAHASSEE-A woman seeking an abortion in florida would have to wait 24 hours before going through with it under a bill passed Frida by the State House. The measure could also make it more likely that she would see an ultrasound image of the fetus before undergoing the procedure.

The House may be as far as that idea goes this year, however, with the waiting period and the effort to require more pre-abortion ultrasounds unlikely to be accepted by the Senate.

The bill, sponsored by Rep. Trey Traviesa, R-Orlando, would require abortion providers perform ultrasounds before almost all abortions, instead of just those in the second or third trimesters as required by current law.

Viewing the images would be optional, but women would have to sign waivers stating they declined the doctors' offers to do so.
I'm very pro-life. But as long as the law is what it is, womens' privacy should be respected in this matter. Bills like this aren't about women and their babies. They're about incumbent hacks trying to prove their pro-life credentials to the fundie fringe. You know, the same people who helped the GOP lose both the House and Senate.

Cattle Prod

Apparently the cows are breaking too much wind.
BARMY Euro MPs are demanding new laws to stop cows and sheep PARPING.

The MEPs have asked the European Commission to "look again at the livestock question in direct connection with global warming".

The official EU declaration demands changes to animals' diets, to capture gas emissions and recycle manure.
Too bad they can't do the same thing about the brain farts these people have.

Next!

And here we have the first of what is sure to be many more to come.
WASHINGTON-Randall Tobias, head of the Bush administration's foreign aid programs, abrptly resigned Friday after his name surfaced in an investigation into a high-priced call-girl ring, said two people in a position to know the circumstances of his departure.

It was Tobias' own decision to resign, according to one of the people, who said the issue came up only in the past day or so. The people spoke to The Associated Press on condition of anonymity because the investigation is still under way.

Tobias submitted his resignation a day after he was interviewed by ABC News for an upcoming program about an alleged prostitution service run by the so-called D.C. Madam.
Scratch one name off the little black book...

Friday, April 27, 2007

They Never Saw It Coming

Shouldn't these people have known ahead of time?
Philadelphia's fortune-tellers didn't see it coming.

Suddenly they're facing a very unhappy future.

Alerted to an obscure state law banning fortune-telling "for gain or lucre," the city's Department of Licenses and Inspections is closing storefront psychics, astrologers, phrenologists and tarot-card readers who charge money for their services.

Inspectors had closed 16 shops since Tuesday, Deputy L&I Commisioner Dominic E. Verdi said yesterday.

"We were not aware it was a crime," he said, "but the Police Department came to us a few days ago and showed us where the crime code prohibits psychic readings.

"We looked into it, and it's clearly illegal. I was surprised."
Well, they still have politicians and their pollsters, so I guess nothing's really changed...

They Call Him MR. Peabody

The PETA poltroons are at it again.
PETA-those People for the Ethical Treament of Animals-has a message for the editors at the Associated Press.

Fido's a "he," not an "it."

The organization, known worldwide for championing animal rights, is now taking its campaign to the written word, calling on Norm Goldstein, editor of The Associated Press Stylebook, to revise its guidelines, which currently characterize animals as inanimate objects.

In a letter written to Goldstein, the animal activists ask the AP to "take a progressive step and give animals the respect that they deserve by revising AP style guidelines to reflect the usage of personal pronouns for all animals."
Let me guess. A doghouse will now be referred to as a canine partner domicile, and a litter box will be referred to as an adjoining feline bathroom. You can't make this stuff up.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

El Diablo

It's Beelzebub's fault!
If you really want to blame someone for trying to destroy the United States, point the finger at... Satan?

The devil, Lucifer...whatever you want to call it, one Utah Republican says it is he who is trying to bring the USA down.

And Satan's apparent weapon of choice: Allowing illegal immigrants to cross the border.

According to The Salt Lake Tribune, Utah County District 65 Chairman Don Larsen has submitted a formal resolution to oppose the devil's plan to destroy the country-to be discussed this weekend at the Utah County Republican Convention.
Satan may indeed be out to get us, but the Republicans don't need any help from him in destroying themselves when they've got goofballs like this.

I'd Walk A Mile

What a bunch of humps. No, really.
GUWEITYYA, Saudi Arabia (Reuters)-The legs are long, the eyes are big, the bodies curvaceous.

Constestants in this Saudi-style beauty pageant have all the features you might expect anywhere else in the world, but with one crucial difference-the competitors are camels.

This week, the Qahtani tribe of western Saudi Arabia has been welcoming entrants to its Mazayen al-lbl competition, a parade of the "most beautiful camels" in the desolate desert region of Guwei'iyya, 120 km (75 miles) west of Riyadh.

"In Lebanon they have Miss Lebanon," jokes Walid, moderator of the competition's Web site. "Here we have Miss Camel."
Maybe they're preparing for the day when they follow Iran's lead and all of their women are in prison...

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

El Rushbo And Rudy

And here's another durn librul and his take on Rudy the Antichrist.
RUSH: All right, Rudy Giuliani. Let's go to the audio sound bites here. Rudy is turning up the heat, getting into some partisanship here, which is good, because there's a huge difference between Rupublicans and Democrats on the war. So say it! And Rudy did. He said, "We have to stay on offense. The Democrats want to put us back on defense." Yesterday in Manchester, New Hampshire, at the Rockingham County Republican Party's annual Lincoln Day Dinner, a portion of Rudy's remarks.

GIULIANI: This war ends when they stop planning to come here and kill us, but until then, if I have anything to say about it, the lesson that I learned coming out of September 11, 2001 is: never, ever again will this country be on defense waiting for them to attack us. (applause) The United States of America will be on offense (applause) and make no mistake about it, the Democrats want to put us back on Defense.

RUSH: Amen! It's about time! It is about time. You know, Rich Galen had it right in his Mullings blog. You've got Harry Reid proclaiming defeat. The war is lost! If the Republican apparatus were up and running, they'd be demanding of every elected Democrat, "Do you stand with Harry Reid? Do you agree with Harry Reid," and then people would be calling for Reid's resignation. None of that is happening...
Rush is right, and Rudy's right. So why do all of the socon mouthbreathers keep saying otherwise?

Giuliani And The God Squad

Another durn librul is making sense when it comes to Giuliani's prospects with religious conservatives.
When I tell my liberal friends and associates that there are only a handful of Republicans that I would vote for before Hillary Clinton, the response is universally the same. I get a blank stare, followed by the question: "Do you really think Rudy Giuliani can win the republican Nomination?"

If you've read about my infatuation with the Giuliani candidacy, you know my answer is YES. While Democracts like to fall in love with a candidate-Howard Dean or Senator Barack Obama, for example-we Republicans prefer picking winners.

While most Republicans would rather support a candidate who opposed abortion rights and supported the Second Amendment, they also realize that, even after seven years of George W. Bush's religious-right mobilization efforts, Americans would be hard pressed to elect such a person. With notable exceptions, like the 2002 California governor's race, Republicans recognize that they, like the Democrats, are a minority party. So, yes, the Religious Right will vote for Rudy Giuliani just as it voted for Arnold Schwarzenegger in California in 2003 and again in 2006.
Well, the sane ones will, anyway. The rest will be having a circle jerk over Duncan Hunter or some other no-name candidate-or stay home out of spite and get what they deserve if Her Hillariness wins.

She's Gone

The Fat Broad is out.
Rosie O'Donnell's stormy tenure on "The View" will be a short one. The opinionated host was unable to agree on a contract with ABC, and she'll leave the show in June.

"My needs for the future just didn't dovetail with what ABC was able to offer me," O'Donnell said in a statement Wednesday.
So now it's just down to two liberal hags and one token conservative. Sounds like the Dummycratic Party in a nutshell.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Paranoia Will Destroy You

There's a big market for tinfoil in Allahland.
A new survey of four major Muslim nations says a large majority of people in those countries believes that undermining Islam is a key goal of U.S. foreign policy. The poll was released Tuesday in Washington and VOA correspondent Meredith Buel has the details.

The survey was conducted by the Center for International and Security Studies at the University of Maryland of more than 4,000 people in Egypt, Pakistan, Indonesia and Morocco.

Steven Kull, director of the university's Program on International Policy Attitudes, says most Muslims polled in these countries have an overwhelmingly unvaforable opinion of the U.S. government.

Kull says what most Americans view as the war on terror since the September 11, 2001 attacks on the United States, is perceived by those Muslims surveyed as an assault on their religion.
Well, the last time I checked we weren't attacked by angry Swedes. It's not our fault everybody we've captured or killed read the Quran.

Doctor Sam

Now this is a cool idea.
NEW YORK (Reuters)-Wal-Mart Stores Inc. said on Tuesday that it will contract with local hospitals and other organizations to open as many as 400 in-store health clinics in the next two to three years.

Should current market forces continue, the world's largest retailer said up to 2,000 clinics could be in Wal-Mart stores over the next five to seven years.

Wal-Mart said the effort marks an expansion of a pilot program it started in 2005, when it leased space within its stores to medical clinics. Currently, it said 76 clinics are operating inside Wal-Mart store in 12 states.
Capitalist-subsidized health care. God how I love the free market.

The Underground Whistlestop

I'm sure Obama will appreciate this.
Hillary Clinton invoked Harriet Tubman at a mega-fund-raiser last night, telling young supporters she'd fight to "take back the White House" just as the escaped slave fought to free others.

The Democratic presidential hopeful brought out the whole family for the "low-dollar" event at the West Side's Pier 94. But Bill Clinton and their daughter, Chelsea, left the limelight to the candidate, who found herself struggling with a faulty microphone.

"This reminds me of one of my favorite American heroines, Harriet Tubman," the senator 1,800 cheering supporters when her mike was restored.
Umm, OK. Miz Clinton is already a fake Southerner, why shouldn't she be a fake black woman, too?

Captain America Calling

The Avengers will not be pleased.
MELBOURNE, Fla.--Police took a super hero into custody after he allegedly attacked a woman in a Florida bar.

Melbourne police officials said Raymond Adamcik, who was dressed as Captain America, made rude suggestions to a woman in a bar and grabbed her between her thighs.

Police said after Adamcik had his booking photo taken, he tried to flush a bag of marijuana and a rolled joint down the toilet.
I know having to fight Iron Man was tough on the guy, but jeeze!

Monday, April 23, 2007

Manhattan Transfer

If you go to the Big Apple, leave your car on the Brooklyn Bridge.
Driving into the most congested half of Manhattan could become an expensive privelage under a wide-ranging city program unveiled Sunday to cope with the booming population and ease stress on the environment.

The package of proposals outlined by Mayor Michael Bloomberg focuses on the city's transportation, energy, water and housing netowks that in some cases already are strained beond capacity by today's 8.2 million people.

The most controversial idea in the plan, from the mayor's Office of Long-term Planning and Sustainability, is a proposal to charge motorists for driving into Manhattan below 86th Street on weekdays from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. Trucks would be charged $21 a day and cars would be charged $8, on top of the city's already expensive parking.
Shoot, if the city wants to rip people off, why don't the do it the old-fashioned way-high rents?

Going For Number Two

The Don Quixote of the Democratic Party is at it again.
CLEVELAND-U.S. Rep. Dennis Kucinich, a vocal critic of the Bush administration's war in Iraq, plans to introduce articles of impeachment against Vice President Dick Cheney on Tuesday.

Kucinich, a Cleveland Democrat who is again running for president, announced Monday that he will hold a news conference in Washington to discuss his bid to oust Cheney. Kucinich spokeswoman Natalie Laber declined further comment.
As much as I might not stand this administration a lot of the time, I have to side with Cheney on this one. He eats Hobbits like they're Fig Newtons.

More Soap, Please

Let's see how long it takes for this guy to become a "Hero."
PHOENIX (AP)-A Border Patrol agent was charged Monday with first-degree murder in the shooting of an unarmed illegal immigrant at the border in January.

An investigation found that Agent Nicholas Corbett's killing of Francisco Dominiquez-Rivera, of Puebla, Mexico, was not legally justified, said Cochise County prosecutor Ed Rheinheimer.

Corbett is also charged with second-degree murder, manslaughter and negligent homicide. A judge wil determine which of the charges the evidence supports best, Rheinheimer said.

"We have concluded that the evidence shows that at the time he was shot, Mr. Dominiquez-Rivera presented no threat to agent Corbett," Rheinheimer said.
Say hello to Ramos and Campeon for me when you get to prison, dirtbag.

Sanctuary, Sanctuary

Isn't most of the state already like this?
Mayor Gavin Newsom vowed Sunday to maintain San Francisco as a sanctuary for immigrants and do everything he can to discourage federal authorities from conducting immigration raids.

The mayor cannot stop federal authorities from making arrests, Newsom told about 300 mostly Latino members of St. Peter's Church and other religious groups supporting immigrants. But no San Francisco employee will help with immigration enforcement.

"I will not allow any of my department heads or anyone associated with this city to cooperate in any way shape or form with these raids," Newsom declared. "We are a sanctuary city, make no mistake about it."
I wish they'd make up ther minds about whether they want to fly a Mexican flag or a Communist one over the city.

They Hate Spunk

Will Katie get canned?
CBS executives deny it, but there's a growing feeling within the network that Katie Couric is an expensive, unfixable mistake.

So unfixable that Couric-the first woman to anchor a network nightly newscast solo-may leave CBS Evening News, probably after the 2008 presidential elections, to assume another role at the network, CBS sources say.

Despite her A-list celebrity, her $15 million salary, and a promotional blitz worthy of a Super Bowl, the former star of NBC's Today has failed to move the Nielsen needle on No. 3 Evening News since her debut seven months ago.
Courage, Katie. See BS will continue to sink like a stone whether you're there or not.

And Natasha Wept

I guess the vodka finally got to him.
MOSCOW (AP)-Former President Boris Yeltsin, who engineered the final collapse of the Soviet Union and pushed Russia to embrace democracy and a market economy, has died, a Kremlin official said Monday. He was 76.

Kremlin spokesman Alexander Smirnov confirmed Yeltsin's death, but gave no cause or further information. The Interfax news agency cited an unidentified medical source as saying he had died of heart failure.
Yeltsin was one of the good guys, more so than Gorby who made nice with the West while trying to save a failing system, certainly more so than the current hack who wants to restart the Cold War. R.I.P., Mr. Yeltsin.

The Real Deal

Jeff Foxworthy tells it like it is when it comes to those evil Red states. Hell yes.

Buttwipe

Now this is what I call talking out of your ass.
Singer Sheryl Crow has said a ban on using too much toilet paper should be introduced to help the environment.

Crow has suggested using "only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where two to three could be required."

The 45-year-old, who made the comments on her wevsite, has just toured the US on a biodiesel-powered bus to raise awareness about climate change.
Well, if getting rid of toilet paper is the answer, then the French are way ahead of the rest of us...

Sunday, April 22, 2007

You're Not The Boss Of Me

As if she knew anything about work.
WASHINGTON-Singer Sheryl Crow, producer Laurie David and White House political adviser Karl Rove got into a war of words on global warming during Saturday night's White House Correspondents' Dinner, The Washington Post reports.

Crow and "An Inconvenient Truth" producer David walked over to the presidential adviser's table, where David suggested that Rove "take a new look at global warming." David said Rove was rude with her, but witnesses say David was very aggressive.

Rove said David came over to insult him and succeeded.

Crow tried to calm things down but was instead drawn into the debate with Rove, telling him, "You work for me."

Rove responded, "No, I work for the American people."
Ladies, take some friendly advice: tangling with The Master is not a good idea.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Radio Unfree Moscow

Bush is Hitler! Bush is Hitler! Well, unless Uncle Putin beats him to it.
MOSCOW, April 21-At their first meeting with journalists since taking over Russia's largest independent radio news network, the managers had startling news of their own: from now on, they said, at least 50 percent of the reports about Russia must be "positive."

In addition, opposition leaders could not be mentioned on the air and the United States was to be portrayed as an enemy, journalists employed by the network, Russian News Service, say they were told by the new managers, who are allies of the Kremlin.

(snip) In a darkening media landscape, radio news had been a rare bright spot. Now, the implenetation of the "50 percent positive" rule at the Russian News Service leaves an increasingly small numvere of news outlets that are not managed by the Kremlin, directly or through the state national gas company, Gazprom, a major owner of media assets.
I'm eagerly awaiting for the usual Hollywood crowd to come out and denounce this crushing of dissent.

There She Is

You go, girl!
WAYNESBURG, Ky. (AP)-Miss America 1944 has a talent that likely has never appeared on a beauty pageant stage: She fired a handgun to shoot out a vehicle's tires and stop an intruder. Venus Ramey, 82, confronted a man on her farm in south-central Kentucky last week aftere she saw her dog run into a storage building where thieves had previously made off with old farm equipment.

Ramey said the man told her he would leave. "I said, 'Oh, no you won't,' and I shot their tires so they couldn't leave," Ramey said.

She had to balance on her walker as she pulled out a snub-nosed .38-caliber handgun.

"I didn't even think twice. I just went and did it," she said. "If they'd even dared come close to me, they'd be six feet under by now."
Plant 'em while they're young. That's what gardening grannies do.

The Downward Spiral

Gonzo's death watch continues.
WASHINGTON-Republican support for Atty. Gen. Alberto R. Gonzales continued to evaporate Friday as the party's third-ranking leader in the House and an influential senator said Gonzales should consider resigning.

A day after failing to mollify members of the Senate Judiciary Committee over his handling of the firing of eight U.S. attorneys, Gonzales launched a last-ditch effort to save his job in phone calls to congressional leaders. But the tide of opinion on Capitol Hill appeared to be turning against him.

Rep. Adam H. Putnam (R-Fla.). chairman of the House Republican Conference, became the highest-ranking House Republican to call for Gonzales to step down, declaring Friday, "It's time for fresh leadership."

"There's been an erosion of confidence certainly in the Congress in his ability to continue to lead" the Justice Department, said Putnam.
But remember, Alberto-yer doin' a fine job...

Bullwhipped

Spoken like a guy who knows.
To the surprise of probably none of the 1,800 Democrats packed into a Birmingham ballroom tonight, former President Bill Clinton said he's decided women should run everything.

"I think it's a real hoot you elected the first woman chief justice," Clinton told state Democrats at their annual Jefferson-Jackson Day Dinner. He was feferring to Alabama Chief Justice Sue Bell Cobb, the first woman to hold that office in state history.

"You know, I've about decided women ought to run everything," a grinning Clinton said as the big crowd yelped and clapped.
I thought he decided that when he married Hillary.

Et Tu, Porky?

The plot thickens.
Federal officials confirmed Thursday they are investigating whether pork products intended for humans are contaminated with the same industrial chemical that prompted a massive pet food recall and sickened cats and dogs nationwide.

Researchers also have identified three other contaminants in the urine and kidneys of animals sickened or killed after eating the recalled foods, including cyanuric acid, a chemical commonly used in pool chlorination, three researchers told the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review. Cyanuric acid is what most likely sickened pets, one reseacher said.
All because some SOB wanted to make an extra buck. Nice.

Friday, April 20, 2007

Just Say Sign

Now this is a guy who knows what being a good dad is all about.
KNOXVILLE, Tenn. (AP)-A father says he wasn't trying to same his 14-year-old son when he made the boy wear a large sandwich-board sign saying, "I abused and sold drugs."

"I'm not out here doing this to humiliate my son," the father told WATE-TV as the teenager walked up and down the sidewalk Wednesday in front of Cedar Bluff Middle School.

"I'm doing this because I love him," he said. "We do have an extreme drug problem in America, and maybe it's time for extreme measures that parents need to take to monitor this problem that we have."
I hope the kid has learned his lesson. They don't let you walk around with a big sign in the joint. Unless you want to tell people you're somebody's boy toy.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Dusty Harry Rides Again

Are we sure Harry Reid isn't French?
U.S. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said on Thursday he told President George W. Bus the Iraq war was lost and the recent U.S. troop increase had accomplished nothing.

Reid, the Senate's top Democrat, described part of a meeting with Bush at the White House on Wednesdaypthe same day bombs killed almost 200 people in Baghdad in the worst day of violence since a U.S.-backed security crackdown was launched there earlier this year.

"This is the message I took to the president," Reid said at a news conference.

"Now I believe myself...that this war is lost, and that the surge is not accomplishing anything, as indicated by the extreme violence in Iraq yesterday," said Reid, of Nevada.
I have criticized the handling of this war many times, but there is a difference between telling the administration they need to come up with new strategies and raising the white flag. For all their assholery, Team Bush was at least trying to win this thing. Now, thanks to Dusty Harry and his fellow jackasses, we could be looking at an Islamist version of Vietnam-with Iran calling the shots, making life miserable for the next President, whomever it is, and humiliating America in a way we haven't seen since Carter. Thanks a lot, Dummycrats.

Phreaks On Parade

Oh, Lord. Here come the inbreds.
The families of those killed in the Virginia Tech massacre may not be able to grive in peace at the funerals of those they lost. An anti-gay religious group known for protesting at the funerals of American soldiers killed in Iraq is planning on appearing at services for those killed on Monday as well.

The Topeka, Kan.-based Westboro Baptist Church 9WBC), which is not affiliated with any national Baptist organization, announced plans to protest at victims' funerals only hours after 32 people were killed in the worst mass shooting in U.S. history. They also may protest at other events on the Virginia Tech campus.
Seriously, these idiots are long overdue for a major hurting. If Phony Phelps and his creeps were to meet with an unfortunate "Accident" at one of the funerals no jury in the world would convict.

Isn't That Special

Now this is what I call passing the buck.
Evangelist Franklin Graham said Cho Seung-Hui, the killer at Virginia Tech University, was "filled with evil," and that Satan is responsible for Monday's mass killings of 32 people at the Blacksburg, Va. campus.

Appearing as a guest Wednesday on Fox News Channel, Graham said the need for healing is great in a community shattered by a madman's shooting rampage.

"There is a big spiritual need here," Graham said. "KIds are questioning, 'Did God abandon us? Why did God allow this to happen?'...They need love, they need our prayers...They need a touch from Almighty God."
God didn't allow this to happen-it was a screwed-up system which let this nutbar loose. And he didn't need any help from the Devil, although I'm pretty sure the Big Bad was cheering him on. I thought that personal responsibility was a Christian trait-you know, something "Real conservatives" are supposed to believe in.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Bin Laden 2.0

So this is what a Mirror Universe Bin Laden would be like?
MANILA, Philippines-Philippine elections are largely a battle of name recall, so Agakhan Sharief has chosen a moniker that will surely capture the attention of voters well beyond his backwater southern province-Usama bin Laden.

Unlike the world's most-wanted terror suspect, Sharief is known by many in Lanao del Sur province as a peacemaker who has helped broker truces when sporadic clashes have erupted between government troops and Muslim insurgents.

Sporting an 18-inch long beard, turban and a neck scarf similar to that worn by bin Laden in TV images, the 35-year-old Sharief has been campaigning frenziedly for a seat in Lanao's legislative council in May 14 elections.

Posters bear his real name with the explosive moniker plastered in the middle in big, bold letters: "BIN LADEN."
Shoot, maybe Nancy Pelosi should go meet with this guy. She's already meeting with other terrorists...

Planet Gunfreea

This will go nowhere fast, but it gives America's most well known Hobbit something to do.
Ohio Congressman Dennis Kucinich wants to ban hand guns in America.

Kucinich is currently drafting legislation that would ban the purchase, sale, transfer or possession of hand guns by civilians. A gun buy-back provision will be included in the bill.

Kucinich announced this move in the aftermath of Monday's deadly shooting at Virginia Tech.
If even Harry Reid won't deal with gun control, I don't know what Dennis the Menace hopes to accomplish. Of course this is a guy who thinks he's the Democratic front-runner.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

A Slip In Time

Talk about a school that literally needs its clocks cleaned.
A fifteen-year-old boy in America was incarcerated for twelve days, wrongly accused of making a hoax bomb threat-because his school had forgotten that the clocks had gone forward.

Cody Webb was arrested last month, after Hempfield Area High School received a bomb threat on their student hotline-which provides a range of information to students about the school-at 3.17am on March 11. They believed they'd found the culprit when they traced the phone number they thought was responsible to Webb.

Unfortunately, they forgot that the clocks had switched to Daylight Saving Time that morning. Webb, who's never even had a detention in his life, had actually made the call an hour earlier.

Despite the fact that the recording of the call featured a voice that sounded nothing like Webb's, the police arrested Webb and he spent 12 days in a juvenile detention facility before the school eventually realised their mistake.
Gee. You'd think they worked for the Bush Administration or something...

Damn Dirty Europeans

Of course it's Chuck's fault.
With a veiw to Monday's deadly shooting rampage at Virginia Tech, European newspapers are blaming the lack of gun control measures in the United States and implying that Charlton Heston is indirectly responsible for the scope of the shootings.

Across the continent on Tuesday, European media rubber-neck at Monday's massacre in the United States. Most seem to agree about one thing: The shooting at Virginia Tech is the result of America's woeful lack of serious gun control laws. In the strongest editorialized image of the day, German cable news broadcaster NTV flashed an image of the former head of the National Rifle Association, the US gun lobby: In other words, blame rifle-wielding Charlton Heston for the 33 dead.
Never mind the fact that cities like Los Angeles and Washington, D.C. have had some of the toughest gun control laws in the country-and the highest murder rates. If we're such a gun-crazy culture, how dome none of the students were armed? If they were, some of them might be alive now. As would some Europeans if they'd been allowed to defend themselves against a certain paperhanger who also believed in gun control.

Monday, April 16, 2007

American Effigy

A kiss is just a kiss, unless it's an excuse to riot.
NEW DELHI (AP)-Angry crowds in several Indian cities are burning effigies of Richard Gere.

It's happening after Gere swept a popular Bollywood actress into his arms and kissed her several times during an AIDS-awareness event. Photraphs of Gere embracing Shilpa Shetty and kissing her on the cheek at an HIV/AIDS awareness event in New Delhi were splashed across front pages.

India is a country were sex and public displays of affection are largely taboo.

In Mumbai, members of the right-wing Hindu nationalist group Shiv Sena beat burning effigies of Gere with sticks and set fire to glamourous shots of Shetty.

Similar protests have broken out in other cities.
Religious nuttery is hardly exclusive to Islamists or American fundamentalists. It's a universal human failing.

Gonzo's Greatest Fear

Here's the latest group of durn libruls calling for Gonzo's departure.
In what could prove an embarrassing new setback for embattled Attorney General Alberto Gonzales on the eve of his testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee, a group of influential conservatives and longtime Bush supporters has written a letter to the White House to call for his resignation.

The two-page lettere, written on stationary of the American Freedom Agenda, a recently formed body designed to promote conservative legal principals, is blunt. Addressed to both Bush and Gonzales, it goes well beyond the U.S. attorneys controversy and details other alleged failings by Gonzales. "Mr. Gonzales has presided over an unprecedented crippling of the Constitution's time-honored checks and balances," it declares. "He has brought rule of law into disrepute, and debased honesty as the coin of the realm." Alluding to ongoing scandal, it notes: "He has engendered the suspicion that partisan politics trumps evenhanded law enforcement in the Department of Justice."
Of course, since Bush has never really cared about that durned law nonsense, this just means that these folks are turncoats or blind to our Fearless Leader's great moral vision for America, right?

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Emission Impossible

As if guys didn't feel useless enough.
Women could one day grow their own sperm, says a scientist who today claims to have turned bone marrow into early-stage sperm cells.

His team is now studying how to grow fully fledged sperm from bone marrow as a means to restore fertility in young men who have undergone cander treatments. It could be five years before trials start.

Prof. Karim Nayernia and his colleagues have completed similar experiments with female mice.

Within a few months, they expect to to see if the method can be extended so that early-stage sperm can in principal be made from women, too.

Along with cloning, this could mark the second technique that makes men redundant.
Well, I guess it's off to the scrap yard. It was nice knowing you, humanity...

Imus On The Inside

You simply cannot make this stuff up.
In a clear sign of its intent to reign in dissdent American media personalities, and their growing influence in American culture, US War Leaders this past week launched an unprecedented attack upon one of their most politically 'connected', and legendary, radio hosts named Don Imus after his threats to release information relating to the September 11, 2001 attacks upon that country.

According to European reports of the events surrounding Don Imus that have gripped the United States this past week, it was during an interview with another Amereican media personality, Tim Russert, who is the host of a television programme frequently used by US War Leaders, wherein while derying the state of care being given to American War wounded stated, "So these bastatds want to keep these boys [in reference to US Soldiers] secret? Let's see how they like it if I start talking about their [in reference to US War Leaders] secrets, starting with 9/11."
Ummm, OK. Of course, one could hardly expect otherwise from Pravda, which at this point seems to have become Russia's version of Scrappleface.

An Army Of Aryans

Ah, springtime in Germany, when the bigots are in bloom.
THE German Defence Ministry is investigating an ameteur video clip of a German army instructor ordering a recruit training with a machine gun to imagine he is firing as "African Americans" who are insulting his mother.

German television networks yesterday aired the video clip.

"You're in the Bronx, a black van pulls up in front of you and three African-Americans get out and start really insulting your mother...now do something!" the instructor says in German while a recruit lying on the ground starts firing his gun.
I guess somebody wanted to remind the rest of the world who really is the most racist nation in the world.

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Cold Turkey

Once again, Rudy gets it.
SPRINGFIELD, Mo.-Republican presidential contender Rudy Giuliani called for a national campaign to achieve energy independence during a Missouri campaign stop Saturdy.

The former New York mayor said a national program to tap new energy sources, akin to the 1960s technological race to beat the Soviets to the moon, would give Republicans a positive issue to stand for in the 2008 White House race.

"Too much of our party is defined by what we're against. Too little is defined by what we're for. When you start being for something, millions and millions of people start to follow you," Giuliani told a fundraising breakfast for Rep. Roy Blunt, R-Mo., the House minority whip.
Of course, he doesn't hate those durn queers, which means he has no chance of winning. So sayeth the tinfoil hat crowd, anyway.

Friday, April 13, 2007

A Fred Flashback

The Rudy haters will go into overdirve trying to spin this one.
During his first run for the U.S. Senate, Fred Thompson said in an interview to a libertarian Republican newsletter that the ultimate decision to have an abortion "must be made by the woman."

The comments were made in the July/August issue of Republican Liberty, the official newsletter of the Republican Liberty Caucus.

In the interview, Thompson was asked: "Some conservatives got flustered by your comments on abortion and Roe vs. Wade. Would you like to explain your position on abortion?"

Thompson answered: "Government should stay out of it. No public financing. The ultimate decision must be made by the woman. Government should treat its citizens as adults capable of making moral decisions on their own."
Now, if that Arthur Branch runs for President, I'll happily support him. But until he does, I'll stick with the guy who really is a libertarian, not just playing one on TV.

Frankenweenie's Fifteen Minutes

The usual suspects are lining up to throw their money away, er, support their latest favorite candidate.
WASHINGTON (AP)-Scores of actors, writers. producers and others from the entertainment industry have contributed to Al Franken's Senate campaign, helping the Minnesota Democrat get off to a strong fundraising start.

Franken, a former "Saturday Night Live" star who hopes to take on GOP Sen. Norm Coleman next year, raised the maximum $4,600 from actors such as Tom Hanks, Paul Newman, Jason Alexander and Larry David, according to a campaign finance report filed Friday.

That helped Franken pull in $1.35 million in the first quarter of the year-despite not beginning his fundraising effort until Feb. 14-just behind Coleman's $1.53 million.
Considering this is Minnesotastan, Frankenweenie just might pull this off. As if Jesse Ventura wasn't enough to make the folks of that state look like idiots.

Meet The Droogs

The kids aren't alright.
Many times the victims are bruised in a fight or shoved down stairs. Others are stabbed with scissors. Last November, one was beaten to death with a hammer.

And the suspects, in more than 1,800 cases documented in Harris County over a recent 2 1/2-year period, were their children.

One longtime prosecutor in the juvenile courts said he was "floored by the numbers" after a survey found 1,831 young people had been charged with assaulting a parent or gaurdian. Another called it an "alarming, alarming trend."
"What we were after now was the old surprise visit. That was a real kick and good for laughs and lashings of the old ultraviolence."

Sister Act

Call it "When Nuns Attack."
NICOSIA (Reuters)-Two people were stabbed and two arrested in scuffles at a Cyprus convent on Thursday in a power struggle between rival factions, police said.

Witnesses said priests and nuns were involved in the night-time fracas at the Metamorphosis tou Sotiros convent, some 35 km (22 miles) south east of the Cypriot capital Nicosia.

Disputes there have been simmering for months over control of its speculated vast wealth.
Shoot, at least in America all our wealthy religious types do is have gay sex and get sent to jail for tax evasion.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

The 18-Email Gap

There's a reason the GOP is called the Stupid Party these days.
Rep. Henry Wasman (D-Calif.), chairman of the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee, just released a fascinating letter that he sent to Attorney General Alberto Gonzales.

In the letter, Waxman asked Gonzales to take steps to protect e-mails in the possession of the Justice Department relating to the firing of eight U.S. attorneys, but Waxman had another purpose in releasing the letter-he wanted to tell the press and public how big the scale of the missing White House e-mail scandal is. And it's pretty big.

Waxman was told today by a Republican National Committee attorney Rob Kelner that "roughly 50 White House officials have had e-mail accounts on RNC servers" at some point since Preisent Bush came to office, accounts that were controlled by the RNC. "Mr. Kelner stated that to his knowledge, the earliest e-mails records of White House officials on RNC severs are from 2004. Although White House officials used RNC e-mails since 2001, the RNC has apparently destroyed all e-mail records from White House officials from 2001, 2002, and 2003."
So, through their own fault, the Republicans have taken a non-scandal and turned it into a real one. These idiots must really enjoy being a minority party.

The Nutty Professors

Only the overely educated could be this obtuse.
Professors rejected a call to add more history to the proposed general education curriculum in a close vote at yesterday's sometimes-chaotic meeting of the Faculty of Arts and Sciences.

Faculty members spent nearly an hour debating whether to add the word "history" to the "Culture and Belief" category of the program that could replace the Core Curriculum as early as Fall 2008. The amendment, initially backed by 65 professors, ultimately failed in an 88-68 vote.

That the outcome of the vote could only be determined by a recount underscored the procedural confusion that plagued much of the meeting. Professors left the 90-minute session having addressed amendments to only two of the eight proposed academic categories, leaving the rest for a previously unscheduled meeting next Tuesday.
And this, ladies and gentlebeings, is why I'm glad I don't have to go to college these days.

The Gene That Stretches Your Jeans

So, it's not just McDonalds' fault, after all? What will the lawyers say?
A gene that contributes to obesity has been identified for the first time, promising to explain why some people easily put on weight while others with similar lifestyles stay slim.

People who inherit one version of the gene rather than another are 70 per cent more likely to be obese, British scientists have discovered. One in six people has the most vulnerable genetic make-up and weighs an average 3kg more than those with the lowest risk. They also have 15 per cent more body fat.

The findings provide the first robust link between a common gene and obesity, and could eventually lead to new ways of tackling one of the most significant causes of ill health in the developed world. One in four British adults is classified as obese, and half of men and a third of women are overweight.
Well, so much for banning fast food. Better luck next time, food police.

Returning To Reagan

Rudy Giuliani, he who is so hated by the rabid socons who now make up the conservative base, sounds off on actual conservatism.
Fiscally conservative governance was at the foundation of New York city's resurgence. Now we need to do the same thing in Washington, building a more accountable government on what I call "the four pillars of prosperity" for sustained economic growth.

1. Reduced spending growth. Fiscal conservatives understand the value of controlling the size and cost of government. Controlling spending makes government more efficient ant more effective in achieving its core responsiblities. But the performance of the government's fundamental functions must also be improved.

(snip) 2. Lower Tax Rates. Americans face a monster tax increase because of "bracket creep," the alternative minimum tax and the expiry of the 2001 and 2003 tax cuts. that means cutting taxes just to keep even. Taxpayers deserve the lowest possible tax rates, simplification and certainty about what those rates are likely to be-not the gimmicks and tricks Congress imposes.

(snip) 3. Regulatory Reform. The US currently has a regulatory black eye. We are being hurt by heavy-handed regulatory laws such as Sarbenes-Oxley and an environment of hyper-litigation and shareholder lawsuits that can be poisonous to the private sector. When companies such as Enron and WorldCom cheated shareholders, they were rightly punished to the extent of the law. But after a scandal, Washington often overreacts the initial reforms. When regulation becomes too burdensome, it weighs on us like a tax. It hurgs the competitiveness of American businesses. That is why regulatory reform must be a priority for the next president.

4. Sound monetary policy. A strong economy and a sound monetary policy are intertwined. The Federal Reserve Board is the ultimate, independent arbiter of monetary policy. It is essential that its appointees are highly qualified individuals who understand that stable, low inflation is an input-not an impediment-to durable economic expansion and stronger economic growth. The Fed shoud function more like a compass than a weather vane, setting direction rather than shifting with the wind.
By the socons' current standards, Reagan wouldn't have gotten the nomination when he supported a more libertarian viewpoint back in the mid-70's. They want perfection, but as religious people they should know that only God is supposed to be perfect, and the Almighty isn't running. They should also realize by now that most of the country doesn't want somebody claiming to be God's mouthpiece for President, either. Of course if they did that, they wouldn't be so desperate to nominate one.

And So It Begins

Here we go.
That didn't take long at all. A few days after Don Imus' racially-charged remarks about the Rutgers women's basketball team, CNN set its sights on Rush Limbaugh and other conservative talk radio hosts.

On Tuesday's "Paula Zahn Now," host Paula Zahn teased an upcoming segment by noting, "If you thin some of the things Don Imus says are insulting, you haven't heard anything yet." She then played Rush Limbaugh's criticism of embryonic stem cell advocate Michael J. Fox from last fall.

Later, in the segment itself, Zahn juxtaposed Don Imus' words with controversial remarks by Limbaugh, Neal Boortz, Michael Savage, and Randi Rhodes-3 conservative/libertarian hosts to one ultra left-wing host.

Then on his Wednesday evening program, CNN host Larry King gave former Air America radio host and Senate candidate Al Franken (D-Minn.) a platform to attack conservative talkers.
Oh, right. Like Al Frankenweenie is an authority on open-mindedness. This is getting beyond stupid. They're not even pretending that they're not advocating censorship anymore.

Ivan And The Bandit

He had a long way to go, and a short time to get there.
A Russian man was arrested over the weekend after crossing international waters on a Japanese beer run, Agence France-Presse reports.

But unlike the beer-smuggling Bandit that Burt Reynolds made famous, 29-year-old Sergei Mikhailovich Vashkevich couldn't outrun the law in his inflatable boat stocked with beer.

Vashkevich, who lives on the Russian island of Sakhalin north of Hokkaido, set out in his raft and bought a 24-bottle case of beer for $80 at a highway rest stop, according to officials.

"He was arrested after a local fisherman reported to police that he sighted a suspicious boat," a police spokesman told the AFP. "He was not under the influence of alchohol or incoherent at that time."
"What we got here is a total lack of respect for the law."

Monkey Man

If true, this is sure to make a lot of creationist heads explode.
Scientists have unearthed remains of a primate that could have been ancestral not only to humans but to all great apes, including chimps and gorillas.

The partial skeleton of this 13-million-year-old "missing link" was found by paleontologists working at a dig site near Barcelona in Spain.

Details of the sensational discovery appear in Science magazine.

The new specimen was probably male, a fruit-eater and was slightly smaller than a chimpanzee, researchers say.
"Read yer Bible! Ain't nothin' but a fraud! Alla them there scientists is just godless heathens anyway! I ain't no ape! I'm a lot smarter, fer one thing! I kin prove it! Watch me add my ABC'S!"

Didn't She Get The Forged Memo?

The spirit of Dan Rather lives on at the House that Murrow Built.
NEW YORK-A CBS News producer was fired and the networl apologized after a Katie Couric video essay on libraries was found to be plagiarized from the Wall Street Journal.

The essay was removed from the CBS Web site and an editor's note was posted saying the item should have credited Jefferey Zaslow of the Journal, the network said Tuesday.

The essays are carried regularly on Couric & Co., the anchor's blog on the CBS News Web site. Couric and producers meet once a week to decide on topics and the producers write them for Couric to read on camera.
And if all else fails, they just use the Kinko's across the street...

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Back To Tralfalmadore

And so it goes.
NEW YORK-Kurt Vonnegut, whose dark comic talent and urgent moral vision in novels like "Slaughterhouse-Five," "Cat's Cradle" and "God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater" caught the temper of his times and the imagination of a generation, died Wednesday night in Manhattan. He was 84 and had homes in Manhattan and in Sagaponack on Long Island.

His death was reported by Morgan Entrekin, a longtime family friend, who said Vonnegut suffered brain injuries as a result of a fall several weeks ago.
I'll always like him for "Harrison Bergeron," which has become far more prophetic than he ever realised. God Bless You, Mr. Vonnegut.

American Jackson

Finally, a way to get Tito out of his cardboard box!
LOS ANGELES (AP)-Another TV talent contest is on the horizon, this one featuring members of the Jackson family.

"Pop Dynasty" is the working title for a contest aimed at finding a family of singers a la the Jacksons, a CBS spokesman said Wednesday.

Jermaine, Tito and LaToya Jackson-but not Michael or Janet, the most famous Jacksons-will serve as judges. LaToya Jackson, who's had a solo singing career, was featured on the CBS reality show "Armed and Famous."
Wait a minute. I thought this was supposed to be a show judged by people who had talent. Ah, well. If this doesn't work out there's always the possibility of a Hollywood Squares revival...

The I-Man Is Out

See what happens when you listen to the likes of Barack Obama?
NEW YORK (AP)-MSNBC said Wednesday it will drop its simulcast of the "Imus in the Morning" radio program, responding to growing outrage over the radio host's racial slur against the Rutgers women's basketball team.

"This decision comes as a result of an ongoing review process, which initially included the announcement of a suspension. It also takes into account many conversations with our own employees," NBC news said in a statement.

The decision was announced on air.
So, when are they going to get rid of a real idiot like Keith Olbermann? Somehow I'm not holding my breath.

So Long, Nifong

It's about time.
All sexual assault, kidnapping and other charges have been dropped against the three Duke University lacrosse players indicted for raping an exotic dancer, North Carolina Attorney Genereal Roy Cooper announced Wednesday.

"The result of our review and investigation shows clearly that there is insifficient evidence to proceed on any of the charges," Cooper said. "Today we are filing notices of dismissal for all charges."

He added: "We believe these cases were a result of a tragic rush to accuse and faulure to verigy serious allegations. Based on these significant inconsistencies of evidence and the various accounts given by the accusing witness, we believe these three individuals are innocent of these charges."
A rush to judgement based on a lack of evidence? Nifong should be working for the Bush administration. Seriously, I hope these guys sue him to the last penny.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Ring Of Fire

There was smoke on the water, and fire in the sky.
NASHVILLE, Tennessee (Reuters)- The Tennessee home of late country icon Johnny Cash burned down on Tuesday as renovations were under way for its new owner, Barry Gibb of the Bee Gees, a local newspaper reported.

Cash and his wife, June Carter Cash, lived together in the lakeside house in Hendersonville, Tennessee, about 20 miles north of Nashville, from 1968 until they died within months of each other in 2003.

The Hendersonville Star News said fire officials have not determned a cause for the blaze.
Johnny's ghost must have really hated disco...

It's Tommy This And Tommy That

And here we have the BBC's version of free speech.
Amid the deaths and the grim daily struggle bravely borne by Britain's forces in southern Iraq, one tale of heroism stands out.

Private Jonson Beharry's courage in rescuing an ambushed foot patrol then, in a second act, saving his vehicles's crew despite his own terrible injuries earned him a Victoria Cross.

For the BBC, however, his story is "too positive" about the conflict.

The corporation has cancelled the commission for a 90-minute drama about Britain's youngest surviving Victoria Cross hero because it feared it would alienate members of the audience opposed to the war in Iraq.
The British Broadcasting Cowards-where no good news is good news.

Public Broadcasting Censorship

If you don't have an anti-American agenda, you're not welcome at PBS.
The producer of a tax-financed documentary on Islamic extremism claims his film has been dropped for political reasons from a television series that airs next week on more than 300 PBS stations nationwide.

Key portions of the documentary focus on Dr. M. Zuhdi Jasser of Phoenix and his American Islamic Forum for Democracy, a non-profit organization of Muslim Americans who advocate patriotism, constitutional democracy and a separation of church and state.

Marylyn Burke says that the Public Broadcasting Service and project managers at station WETA in Washington, D.C., excluded his documentary, Islam vs. Islamists, from the series America at a Crossroads after he refused to fire two co-producers affiliated with a conservative think tank.
Considering that PBS is funded on our dime, I say maybe we should pull the plug and let them try and spread their agenda without taxpayer support.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Sex And The City

Meet the world's loneliest man, who was literally sucking off the government teat.
NEW UORK- A former city maintenence worker used repeating payments of $49.94 to a "John Awesome" to steal thousands of dollars from the city, prosecutors said Saturday.

Investigators want to know if it is related to a larger theft of $3.6 million.

Prosecutors said Duwinn McClelland lifted a city bank account number from his workers' compensation checks, then somehow used it to tap into the government fund for his own use.

McCelland is accused of quietly taking $4,000 over about 3 1/2 years, most of it in the form of automatic clectronic payments to two sexually explicit websites. He was arraigned Saturday on larceny and fraud charges.
He found out a way to steal from the government and spent it all on porn? He shouldn't be working for the city; he should be running for Congress.

Happy Nuke Day

Surprise, surprise. In spite of the British sailors and Marines being freed, Iran isn't backing down.
President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad on Monday vowed that world powers would not be able to stop Iran's nuclear drive and that the Islamic republic would defend its atomic programme "to the end."

"The great Iranian nation, which for past centuries has been a pioneer of science, will not allow some bullying powers to put obstacles in its path of progress by influencing the international community," he said in a speech.
This is what happens when the British lion turns out to be a paper tiger. I hope the Brits are proud of themselves.

Imus In The Doghouse

The I-Man is out, at least for now.
Don Imus will be punished for his controveersial comments about the Rutgers women's basketball team.

NBC News has decided to suspend him, allowing him to finish the week on MSNBC, but suspending the simulcast of his radio show for the two weeks after that. CBS Radio also said it would suspend Imus for the same period.
Now, I'm not a fan of Imus and his hippie cowboy schtick. But if they ban him, then I want HBO to keep Chris Rock off the air every time he opens his mouth about Whitey, and I won't even get into Al $harpton. Of course, everybody knows that censorship is only for those who won't toe the politically correct line.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Gonzo Going, Going...

Add one more durn librul to the list of those who want Gonzo gone.
WASHINGTON-Joining a growing list of Republicans, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich said Sunday that Attorney General Alberto Gonzales should consider resigning. the possible presidential candidate said the botched firing of U.S. attorneys has destroyed Gonzales' credibility as the nation's top law enforcer.

"I think the country, in fact, would be much better served to have a new team at the Justice Department, across the board," Gingrich said. "I cannot imagine how he is going to be effective for the rest of this administration...They're going to be involved in endless hearings."
Just remember, Alberto-yer doin' a heckuva job.

"We Can't Do This To Us!"

You reap what you sow.
WASHINGTON-Social conservatives seeking to ban abortion and same-sex marriage are worried that their agenda is increasingly being overshadowed by the war in Iraq, making it more difficult for their voices to be heard in Congress and the presidential campaign than at any time in more than a decade.

While conservative social issues were widely considered pivotal in President Bush's victory in 2004, social conseervatives say they fear the 2008 elections will be decided by an event out of their control-the war-and dominated by Republican presidential candidates who are faithful to the party line on Iraq but less suuportive on gay rights, abortion, and end-of-life issues.

Ken Blackwell, a Republican who ran unsuccessfully for Governor of Ohio last year, said conservatives will have a hard time pushing their agenda to the forefront of the presidential campaign until the war retreats as an issue.

"I don't think we have to win the war by the next election. But I think we have to make more Americans believe the war is being prosecuted competently, and for a reason," said Blackwell, who recently joined the Family Research Council as senior fellow for family empowerment.
Well, I have some bad news for Mr. Blackwell: the guy the social conservatives thought was their savior, President Bush, hasn't given them much reason to feel that way. And this might come as a surprise, but most people still care more about beating the Jihadists than they do about keeping those durn queers from marrying. It's weird, I know.

Saturday, April 07, 2007

The House That Sheehan Built

Hippies and money don't mix.
With allegations of money mismanagement, threats of court action and some members leaving, a group that has sponsored war protests in President Bish's adopted hometown has been anything but peaceful.

The Crawford Peace House recently lost its corporate charter with the state, and a former member who now has rights to the name is threatening legal action because the group continues operating.

Sara L. Oliver and some others are calling for a state investigation as to why only $14, 700 is now in its bank account, saying tens of thousands donated during Cindy Sheehan's 2005 war protest are unaccounted for.

"There are people who have said, 'Don't say anything because you'll hurt the peace movement," Oliver said. "But if the peace movement isn't pure and transparent and holy as it can be at its heart, then it's just like George Bush: lying, thieving, conniving, backstabbing bastards."
No, it's not just like George Bush. The Left has been lying, thieving, and conniving long before he was around.

Galileo figaro

That's a man, baby. Or at least it was.
What does it take for a healthy man to choose to have his testicles removed? Roger Davies is one of a surprising number who have found salvation in castration.

Like many sensitive teenagers, Roger Davies felt different from his peers. He wasn;t into sport and abhorred the aggression he saw in other boys. When, at the age of 22, he still hadn't grown out of his sense of isolation, he took radical action: he travelled to America and underwent castration.

"I'm really happy with who I am now," says the 25-year-old cleaner and caterer from Southport. "I don't have any desire to be accepted as a woman or change genders. I just didn't like my masculinity."
Shoot, if he wanted to be castrated for life, why didn't he just go ahead and get married? Or become a Republican?

Scout's Honor

Score one for the good guys.
The U.S. Court of Appeals for the 7th Circuit dismissed a lawsuit by the American Civil Liberties Union to stop the Defense Department from allowing the Boy Scouts of America to hold its National Jamboree every four years at Fort A.P. Hill in Fredericksburg, Va.

The ACLU, suing on behalf of individual named taxpayers, had argued allowing the Boy Scouts to hold the event on public property is an unconstitutional establishment of religion, because the organization's membership is lomited to those who believe in God.

The ACLU points out the Boy Scouts require members to swear an oath to "do my duty to God and my country."

The court ruled Wednesday, however, the ACLU did not show standing to bring the lawsuit.

Peter Ferrara, general counsel of the American Civil Rights Union explained the ACLU could complain about the policy to Congress or the president, but it "had no business bringing a lawsuit over it and asking the courts to step in."

(snip) The Defense Department, which sees holding the event at the fort as a boon to military recruitment, is expressly authorized to host the event by a federal statute enacted by Congress, Ferrara points out.
Exactly. Federal law says this is OK. Therefore, no violation of the separation of Church and State legally exists. Therefore, the ACLU can go take a hike. Case closed.

Jailhouse Jihad

Here's another example of the Bush legacy in Iraq.
America's high-security prisons in Iraq have become "terrorist academies" for the most dangerous militant groups, according to former inmates and Iraqi government officials.

Inmates ate left largely to run their own blocks, which are segregated on sectarian lines. The policy has created a closed world run by Iraq's worst terrorists and militias, into which detainees with no links to insurgent groups are often thrown.

Inmated from Camp Cropper, the U.S. prison at Baghdad airport, described to The Times seeing Al Qaeda terrorists club to death a man suspected of being an informer. Otjers dished out retribution with razor wire stolen from the fences.

Captain Philip Valenti, a U.S. officer responsible for prisons, said he knew of at least three cases of prisoners being murdered by inmates.

"We are very concerned about insurgent efforts to recruit and convert detainees," he said.

(snip) Vying factions often feed fake tips about their enemies to U.S. forces, meaning just about anyone can end up in jail. While the U.S. military is scrupulous about separating Sunnis from Shiite, they pay less attention to keeping seasoned terrorists apart from people picked up in security sweeps.

Abu Tibeh and his colleagues-four Sunnis and four Shiite-were arrested in November when someone told a U.S. patrol that the party offices they were guarding were being used by a death squad. In fact, the party was a moderate secular faction with close ties to the U.S.
But that won't matter to the "Torture 'em all, let God sort it out" crowd. After all, it's a war, and anything goes in the name of victory, right?

Friday, April 06, 2007

The Redcoats Are Coming?

Sometimes life really does imitate South Park.
The man charged with protecting Americans from terrorist attack has told Sky News he is worried radicalised Britons could try to mount an assault on his country.

Michael Chertoff, the Head of Homeland Security, said the US needed furtheer protection from so-called "clean skins" in Britain or Europe.

That is the name given by the intelligence community to those people who feel alienated but have not come to the attention of the authorities.
Somebody needs to go into the schnizz...

Black Gold, Asian Tea

So greedy America wants Iraq's oil all for itself? Not quite.
NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com)-Despite claims by some critics that the Bush administration invaded Iraq to take control of its oil, the first contracts with major oil firms from Iraq's new government are likely to go not to U.S. companines, but rather to companies from China, India, Vietnam, and Indonesia.

While Iraqi lawmakers struggle to pass an agreement on exactly who will award the contracts and how the revenue will be shared, experts say a draft version that passed the cabinet earlier will likely uphold agreements previously signed by those countries under Saddam Hussein's government.

"The Chinese could announce something within the next few months" if all goes well with the oil law, said James Placke, a senior associate at Cambridge Energy Research Associates who specializes in the Middle East.
This could go a long way toward helping the Iraqis rebuild their economy and that, in turn, will help our troops get home sooner. Now that's the way you run an empire.

Three Laws Safe

If Will Smith ever goes to Japan, he won't have anything to worry about.
When the science fiction writer Isaac Asimov envisioned a future shared by human beings and robots, he predicted that the mechanical servants of tomorrow would be safely controlled by only three simple laws.

But when Japan's notoriously zealous bureacracy looks into the future, it sees robots enmeshed in miles of red tape.

Three laws, the robotics experts say, are nowhere near sufficient to ensure human safety in a world where cleaning, carrying and even cooking could one day be performed by machines. So the Ministry of Economy, Trade and Industry has drafted a hugely complex set of proposals for keeping robits in check.

The document, entitled Draft Guidelines to Secure the Safe Performance of Next Generation Robots, was obtained by The Times yesterday. It extends to nearly 60 pages of civil service jargon. It calls for the formation of a special study group of industrialists, academics, ministry officials and, or course, lawyers to draw up a set of firm proposals to govern the development of robots.
Hermes Conrad would love Japan.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Am I Blue

Yikes! It doesn't look good for the GOP in 2008.
Our latest electoral college map shows that regardless of candidate, if the election were held today, a Democrat would be elected to the nation's highest office. Red states that would flip include: Nevada, Colorado, New Mexico, Missouri, Iowa, Arkansas, Ohio and West Virginia. No Blue state would become red. The count would be: Democrats, 306, Republicans 232.
For my own part, I believe this is what certainly could happen-if the Dems nominate somebody besides Hillary and the Republicans nominate somebody besides Giuliani or Romney. People on both the right and the left want a breath of fresh air, and no amount of ranting from the fundamentalists is going to change that.

Honesty Is The Best Policy

Rudy lays it down for the religious right.
WASHINGTON (CNN)-Rudy Giuliani's message to social conservatives: If you don't like my views, don't vote for me.

The Republican presidential frontrunner Thursday reaffirmed his support for federal funding for some abortions, a position which puts him at odds with many conservatives. during a press conference at the State Capitol in Columbia, South Carolina, he said he didn't expect to win over 100 percent of the voters.

"If that's real important to you, if that's the most important thing, I'm comfortable with the fact that you won't vote for me," the former mayor said.
Bingo. Rudy realizes that most of the country is not socially conservative to the extent that the fundamentalists who supported Bush and his fellow GOP wannabes are. Americans don't want a nannystater for president; they want a tough but competent leader. If the social conservatives can't understand that, then they have no one but themselves to blame if Hillary gets elected.

In Utopia there Is No Beer

Baby Hugo is determined to keep Homer Simpson out of New Cuba, er, Venezuela.
Venezuela's government left bar-owners reeling by imposing an alchohol ban over Holy Week and Easter weekend, forcing drinkers in the whisky-mad Catholic country to use covert methods in search of a fix.

The ban outlaws drinking alchohol from 5:00 pm to 10:00 am each night from March 31, and all day from the following Thursday to Easter Sunday. It aims to lower the toll of traffic accidents due to drunk-driving over the period.

But it has led the South American country's top beer brewer, Cerverceria Polar, to cancel a series of festive events it had planned for the week on the tourist island of Margarita and other resorts.
Hugo should be more careful. He might give American nannystaters ideas.

The Peanut Candidate

Of course he does.
WASHINGTON (CNN)-Former President Jimmy Carter expressed his support for House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's trip to Syria, rejecting White House criticism of the visit.

"I was glad that she went," Carter said Wednesday. "When there is a crisis, the best way to help resolve the crisis is to deal with the people who are instrumental in the problem."

Pelosi arrived in Syria on Tuesday, in an attempt to open direct dialogue with Syria's leader, something President Bush opposes. Pelosi also discussed with President Bashar Al-Assad concerns about Syria's support for militant groups.
As much as I disagree with Bush, this is a bad move on the Democrats' part. The President is the one who is supposed to set our foreign policy, not Congress.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Shout It Out Loud

Big Brother is watching you. And now saying it to your face, too.
'Talking" CCTV cameras that tell off people dropping litter or committing anti-social behaviour are to be extended to 20 areas across England.

They are already used in Middlesbrough where people seen misbehaving can be told to stop via a loudspeaker, controlled by control centre staff.

About 500,000 will be spent adding speaker facilities to existing cameras.

Shadow home affairs minister James Brokenshire said the government should be "very careful" over the cameras.
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to have a conversation with you.

We Don't Need No Stinkin' War

I've heard of denial, but these goofs make ostriches look like effing sentries on guard duty.
The House Armed Services Committee is banishing the global war on terror fron the 2008 defense budget.

This is not because the war has been won, lost or even called off, but because the committee's Democratic leadership doesn't like the phrase.

A memo for the connittee staff, circulated March 27, says the 2008 bill and its accompanying explanatory report that will set defense policy shoyld be specific about military operations and "avoid using colloquialisms."
Now, did Bush screw up in Iraq? Yes. Is this administration so anal when it comes to homeland security they make Nixon look like a piker? Of course. But at least they still acknowledge there's a wider war going on. The Dummycrats not only want to turn back the clock to the good old days of the 90's, they want to pretend the attacks of 9-11 never happened. And that is why I would never vote for these dorks.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

BBQ Boneheads

You can't make this stuff up.
BRUSSELS, April 3 (RIA Novosti)-The government of Belgium's French-speaking region of Wallonia, which has a population of about 4 million, has approved a tax on barbequing, local media has reported.

Experts said that between 50 and 100 grams of CO2, a so-called greenhouse gas, is emitted during barbequing. Beginning June 2007, residents of Wallonia will have to pay 20 euros for a grilling session.

The local authorities plan to monitor compliance with the new tax legislation from helicopters, whose thermal sensors will detect burning grills.
"You there! Put...the...spatula...down! You're under arrest!"

The Apple Of Allah's Eye

"He my terrorist's daddy."

The German interior ministry is appealing against a decision by the Berlin authorities to allow an Islamist to name his son Jihad, the Arabic word for holy war.

Reda Seyam fought for 18 months for permission to give his sixth child the name aftere the registry in the Berlin district of Charlottenburg initially rejected his application, saying the name was inappropriate because of its association with terrorism, and "may endanger the child."

This week a court overturned the ruling, on the grounds that Jihad was "a recognized male forename in the Arab world and loved by Muslims."

The family just wants to make sure the kid has a good upbringing in the future European caliphate...

One Toke Over The Line

It says something about the state of the GOP when I actually agree with a Democrat.
SANTA FE (AP)-Nearly three decades after medical marijuana was first approved in New Mexico, Gov. Bill Richardson on Monday signed a law authorizing the state Department of Health to give the drug to some seriously ill patients.

New Mexico became the 12th state to legalize the use of marijuana for medical reasons.

Richardson said the new law provides "a humane option for New Mexicans living with cancer, HIV and other serious medical conditions."
Compared to the control freaks who run the GOP these days, Richardson sounds like Barry Goldwater. I say good for him on this issue.

Monday, April 02, 2007

Crazy From The Mercury

Yet more evidence that environmentalists can be hazardous to your health.
NEW YORK (Reuters)-There's an old joke about the number of people it takes to change a light bulb. Bit because the newer energy-efficient kinds contain tiny amounts of mercury, the hard part is getting rid of them when they burn out.

Mercury is poisonous, but it's also a necessary part of most compact flourescent bulbs, the kind that environmentalists and some governments are pushing as a way to cut energy yse.

With an estimated 150 million CFLs sold in the United States in 2006 and with Wal-Mart alone hoping to sell 100 million this year, some scientists and environmentalists are worried that most are ending up in garbage dumps.

Mercury is probably best-known for its effects on the nervous system. The Mad Hatter in the classic children's book "Alice in Wonderland" was based on 19th-century hat makers who were continually exposed to the toxin.

Mercury can also damage the kidneys and liver, and in sufficient quantitities can cause death.
Yes, but at least Mother Nature will be safe from your evil, energy-consuming ways.

Qutting God's Team

Another Bush flunky is stepping down.
WASHINGTON-Wade Horn, the Bush administration's point man for welfare reform, Head Start and abstinence education, resigned Monday as assistant secretary for children and families.

In the Department of Health and Human Services, Horn oversaw a $46 billion budget and 65 programs that serve vulnerable children and families. He is best known for his work on issues embraced by social conservatives, such as more money for faith-based groups and organizations that worl to help couples improve their marriage.

(snip) Robert Rector, a senior fellow at the Heritage Foundation, a conservative think tank, said Horn tackled the most important social issue in the United States while others ignored it-the decline of the institution of marriage.

(snip) "The government went decade after decade pretending the problem didn't exist," Rector said. "He raised the public profile. He directly addressed it over and over again. He's the first one to do that. Others in this position were frightened away by the issue."

Others viewed Horn's work more skeptically. Horn oversaw a dramatic increase in fucning for abstinence education, which now exceeds $200 million a year. Some groups say it's important to promote abstinence to youth, but that message won't work for all. They would prefer that the administration fund comprehensive sex education programs, which would include abstinence as part of the curriculum.
"Our kids may not know a heck of a lot about safe sex, but they'll know that if they have sex before they're married, they're gonna go straight to Hell," Bush said in a statement praising Horn's work. "It's all part of the Lord's plan. God Bless America!"

Carbon Credits for Nothing

See? It is a scam, after all.
The amount of greenhouse gas pumped into European skies rose by up to 30 million tonnes last year despite the EU's pledge to lead the world in tackling climate change.

A much-heralded emissions trading scheme, which is being copied by California and is seen as the market solution to reducing harmful gases, failed to achieve the cuts in industrial pollution needed to hit Kyoto targets, figures from the European Commission showed.

The Europe-wide increase in CO2 came in the second year of the scheme to allocate emission permits to companies and power generators. Critics described the EU trading system as "botched central planning" because too many permits were granted, enabling polluters to buy them at knockdown prices and carry on producing the gases that cause climate change.
Botched central planning from socialists? I am shocked.

Lord Of the Recounts

One of the most bizzare spectacles in American history is coming to a TV screen near you.
HBO is revisiting one of the most dramatic events in U.S. election history with "Recount," a film about the 2000 turmoil in Florida to be directed by Oscar winner Sydney Pollack.

Paula Weinstein is executive producing the HBO Films Project, which is targeted to premiere in spring 2008.

Written by actor Danny Strong, Spring Creek Prods.' "Recount" chronicles the weeks after the 2000 presidential election and goes behind the scenes of the recounts in Florida to explore the human drama of ordinary people caught up in an extraordinary event that would decide the leadership of the country.
I don't know about anyone else, but if they even mention "Pregnant chads," I might have to shoot out my TV screen.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

About Face

This is huge!
In a surprise move, the paper published a story that actually questioned the ethics of former NYT favorite presidential candidate, Hillary Clinton. The article specifically addressed her involvement in the Whitewater affair, the White House travel agency scandal, and her ties to illegal campaign fund raising. Regarding husband, Bill's multiple affairs, the NYT wanted to know what she knew and when and why she remained silent for so long. The ediforial page followed the trend towards objective analysis and endorsed Rudy Giuliani as being the New Yorker who could best serve the country.
P.S. April Fools!

The Ministry Of Truth

If the truth offends thee, take it out.
Schools are dropping the Holocaust from history lessons to avoid offending Muslim pupils, a Government backed study has revealed.

It found some teachers are relictant to cover the atrocity for fear of upsetting students whose beliefs include Holocause denial.

There is also resistance to tackling the 11th century Crusades-where Christians fought Muslim armies for control of Jerusalem-because lessons often contradict what is taught in local mosques.

The findings have prompted claims that some schools are using history 'as a vehicle for promoting political correctness'.
So, how long will it be before British children are forced to attend the local Madrass? And thus it continues...

Le Sarkozy Revolution

It looks like some long-overdue changes are finally coming to the house that Chirac built.
Nicolas Sarkozy will give France a short, sharp shock if he is elected president, pushing through what one of his close aides described as "tough love" measures in his first weeks in power.

Advisers have told the presidential front-runner that he will have a window of only three months to introduce the most controversial of his proposed reforms, which deal with tax issues, unemployment and immigration.

Axel Poniatowski, an inflential member of his election team, promised that Mr Sarkozy would take advantage of the "wave of euphoria" expected to follow his victory to give France a kick-start, before "obstructions" were put in his way.
Sarkozy sounds like a breath of fresh air (no mean feat in France) but if he really wants to change things he'll have to give France more than just a jolt. He'll need to perform triple-bypass surgery.